


Thicker Than Blood

by jagwriter78



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-04-10
Updated: 2007-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:06:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 25,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25528660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jagwriter78/pseuds/jagwriter78
Summary: What's the one thing that could force Rose Tyler to leave the Doctor?
Relationships: Tenth Doctor/Rose Tyler
Kudos: 5





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the prologue to a story I am currently working on. It's not the usual Doctor/Rose shipper story you find out there, therefore I'd appreciate any comments, good or bad :)

Her fingers trembled slightly as she fidgeted with the controls in front of the monitor. She had seen the Doctor operate them numerous times, and it had looked so easy. Press a button here, switch a lever there, and the monitor would show you what you wanted to see. But all Rose stared at on the monitor was a blue oval shaped symbol that blinked at her at different intervals. She was missing one vital component – the sonic screwdriver. Without that little gadget, she could push as many buttons and twist as many knobs as she wished, she wasn’t going to get the result she wanted.

Her head started to throb, and she rubbed her finger against her forehead. She had waited far too long to do this. She had to be certain now. Just – she couldn’t and she wouldn’t ask the Doctor for this favour. Maybe she was crying wolf, she thought once again. ‘Highly unlikely’ suddenly flashed across her inner eye in big bold red letters.

Frustrated, she kicked the console in front of her which sent the TARDIS rotor reeling into a mad spin for a very short moment – a moment, however, that did not go unnoticed by the Doctor, and he burst through the door into the control room only a second later.

“I felt a bump. Did you feel a bump? I am pretty sure it was a bump,” he rambled as he rushed towards the console and pulled the monitor away from Rose and towards himself. “There shouldn’t be a bump. We are in hibernation. Standing still. You felt the bump as well, right?”

He focused on the monitor, and he frowned slightly when he saw the blue symbol blinking at him. He knew exactly what it meant. His eyes narrowed on Rose.

“That’s the intruder alert. Did you mess with the console?”

“Sorry,” came her short reply and she quickly turned away from the Doctor, stuffing her hands into the pockets of her jacket. Her feet carried her to the other side of the console, away from the Doctor, away from the now madly beeping monitor.

“Oi, initiation of the medical protocol. What did you do that one for? You not feeling well? Do you need a doctor? Well, a real doctor of course, not me,” he peeked around the rotor, the enthusiasm on his face turning into concern as she watched him, “You’re not sick, are you?”

“I’m fine,” she replied with a quick shake of her head.

“You must have turned on that programme for a reason. Come on, now. A quick scan doesn’t hurt, and whatever you wanted to check out will be taken care of.”

“No, really, ‘s fine. I don’t need a scan anymore.”

“Doctor’s orders!” he insisted and reached out his hand towards her. “It’s not going to hurt, I promise.”

“I am not sick,” she replied annoyed and moved further away from him, simply ignoring the hand he was waving at her.

“Then there’s no reason to worry about a short scan, right?”

“There’s no reason for a scan in the first place.”

“Rose….” He took a deep breath before he rounded the console, trying to catch up with his human companion, but the closer he got, the farther she seemed to move away. “If you are feeling sick, you have to tell me. For all we know you could have picked up the Draiendoan flu when we stopped at Sornal a few days back. It was going around, you know.”

”I ain’t puking green stuff, am I?” she tried to reason with him, but he wasn’t going to have any of it. He quickened his pace, which just resulted in her starting to jog.

“You worked the console for a whole half hour, trying to get the medical programme running. I can read the logs, Rose. There’s gotta be a reason for you to do that. I don’t care if you are too embarrassed to tell me. You wanted a scan, you’re gonna get one.”

He reached his hand inside his suit pocket and retrieved the screwdriver. The low hum of the gadget was barely heard in the control room, the blue light getting lost in the turquoise rays emanating from the rotor. He pointed the tip at Rose the best he could as they both moved around the controls in circles. She wasn’t going to get away from him, not this time. If she had picked up the Draiendoan flu, she was in serious danger.

“Stop bleeping at me!” Rose demanded as she tried to dodge the Doctor and the small alien device in his hand.

She knew perfectly well though that she couldn’t get away from him. If the Doctor had set his mind on something, there was no escaping him. She heard the monitor beep, and the Doctor exclaim “ah ha” behind her, and she stopped dead in her tracks. Her eyes fell shut, and she took a deep breath. It was time for the truth. There was no hiding from the Doctor any longer. She was certain what the result would be, and soon, he would know as well.

She heard his trainers squeak on the metal flooring while he moved towards the monitor on the other side in fast strides. A moment of silence passed, then she heard a low creak. Another few seconds of silence followed, then the whirring sound of the screwdriver and the Doctor cursing in a language alien to her as he slapped the device against his hand.

“Blimey, I think it’s broken,” he announced, and Rose turned around to face him. “Can’t tell a human from a Gallifreyan anymore. It’s honestly telling me there are two hearts beating in your body.”

Rose stared at him for a moment, then opened her mouth to say something, but the words failed her. The screwdriver was not broken. She knew for sure now. Tears started to well in the corners of her eyes as she stared at the monitor in disbelief. There it was, two heartbeats, one faster than the other.

“It’s not broken,” she replied with a raspy voice, as her fingers traced the small thumping circle that indicated the second heartbeat.

“Course it is. You can’t have two heartbeats. You are human. Humans are born with only one…. “ he stopped in the middle of his sentence as the thought finally hit him. He reached for the glasses in his pocket, swiftly slid them on, and intently stared at the thumping motion in front of him. Clearly, there were two heartbeats on the monitor, and it definitely was no mistake.

His eyes fixed on Rose’s fingers as they slowly circled the smaller of the symbols which beeped at them in a fast, but steady interval.

“Blimey,” he rasped, and swallowed hard, “one heart, one human. Two hearts…”

“Two humans,” Rose finished for him as a single tear spilled down her cheek. “I’m sorry.”

The momentary shock disappeared from the Doctor’s face rather quickly, and a smile started to play across his lips as he slowly approached her. He reached out his hand, his fingers tenderly brushing over her cheek as he brushed away the tear.

“Don’t cry, my Rose. This should be happy moment and not one you are sorry for. You’re having a baby!” he exclaimed excited, the smile broadening across his whole face.

That was when Rose couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. They fell freely from her eyes, trickling down her cheeks and over the Doctor’s hand. She finally knew what she had suspected for so many weeks. The one thing that shouldn’t have happened had happened.

“It’s okay,” she heard the Doctor whisper, and she suddenly found herself encircled by his arms, pressed tightly against his body.

“It’s okay,” his voice echoed in her ears as she cried against his shoulder like a child.

She didn’t know what to feel right now. The certainty that she was having a baby had sent her whole emotional state on a mad roller coaster ride. She didn’t know why she was crying; she just felt empty inside.

She didn’t know for how long the Doctor cradled her in his arms as she wept. She felt his hand brush over her hair as he tried to soothe her, heard his voice murmur sweet nothings to her. He gave her the time she needed to calm down, never broke their physical contact, never pushed her away. He just held her in his arms, rocked her back and forth in a slow and tender rhythm.

“Everything better now?” he finally asked when she pulled away, wiping away the dried tears from her face.

“Just came as a shock, ‘s all,” she replied, and took a deep breath as she stuffed her hands into her pockets.

“Shock, yeah, I can see that.” He took off his specs, twisting them in his hands before he placed them on top of the console at his side. “You must have known something was up though. How long?”

“Coupla weeks?” she answered, biting her lower lip. She earned a stern look from the Doctor in response, and his brow furrowed. Her final confession was not what he expected though.

“’kay, a coupla months.”

“A couple of months?” he gasped, shaking his head slightly, “Why did you never say a word? Rose, you can trust me with anything, don’t you know that by now?”

“’s just awkward, you know. I mean, ‘s not like I could’ve just said, ‘by the way, got myself knocked up’, is it?”

“Maybe not in those words,” he uttered and turned towards the console, a contrite look on his face.

The initial excitement had slowly worn off when he had started to realize what this news meant for them. He had to take her back to her time, back to London – back home. She couldn’t travel with him anymore, not when she was carrying a new life under her heart. He attracted danger like a magnet, and that was the last place where he wanted her to be - at his side when once again danger found him.

The rotor sped up its movement a moment later, and the comforting, whirring sound of the TARDIS filled the inside of the control room.

“Where are we going?” Rose inquired, a hint of excitement in her voice as she walked up beside him.

“I’m going to take you home.”

“No!” she exclaimed immediately, putting her hand on top of his to stop him from moving the golden glowing crystal ball on the console. “Please, I can’t go home.”

He sighed as he looked up, trying to avoid looking at her. This wasn’t going to be easy, but he had no other choice. As much as he wanted her to stay and continue to travel to the end of time and space with him, he knew that that was not her place any longer. Within the blink of a moment, everything had changed, and he suddenly realized that that was what she had been afraid of all along.

“Mum’s gonna go mental if I tell her,” Rose’s voice brought him back into reality. Slowly, he turned towards her, and found a pair of dark brown eyes fixed on him, desperately pleading not to take her home.

“Gotta tell her sooner or later. Knowing your mother, she’s gonna go mental no matter when you tell her. It’s just gonna get harder the longer you wait.”

“I will tell her,” she said and walked away from him, her hand casually brushing over the edge of the console as she rounded it to the other side, “jus’ not right now.”

“Fine,” he huffed as she sent the rotor into a mad spin, and the TARDIS shook momentarily, but steadied itself within seconds. “We’re gonna go back to London, whether you want to talk to your mother or not. You have to see a doctor to make sure you and the baby are all right. There is going to be no discussion about that.”

“Please, not back to my time. Maybe a hundred years in the future, yeah? We’ll find a doctor there. I just can’t go back to my time. Can’t tell mum, not right now. I need time to think about what to say. Can’t just walk in and tell her she’s gonna be a granny. She’s gonna kill me.”

“Yeah, she’d probably do some bodily harm and then think better of it,” he smirked, a lopsided grin on his face which caused Rose’s lips to curve into a weak smile in return. “But you will tell her, promise me.”

“I’ll tell her eventually.”

“Promise me, Rose.”

“I promise.”


	2. Chapter 2

They had just entered the vortex again, and the TARDIS slowly swung through the red coloured swirl. She had taken adjustments into her own hands, making rides as smooth as she could for Rose. The sickness was long gone, but as time had passed, the time machine had grown aware of the fact that she could not just jumble her passengers around anymore like she used to. She was cautious enough not to hit any bumps along the way, trying to avoid any movement that would cause the travellers that called her home to be thrown around inside. She had adjusted well to the needs of a pregnant woman, and though Rose had never voiced it out loud, the TARDIS could feel that the human was greatly appreciating all the effort the old lady was putting into accommodating her. And so was the Doctor.

Things had grown awkward between them quite some time ago. Rose had become rather quiet and distant, keeping the Doctor at bay most of the time. He could not touch on the subject of the baby without her glaring at him. It was as if she was trying her best to ignore the fact that very soon, they would grow by one. Boxes with clothes and toys he had picked up sat stashed away in the back of the TARDIS. She had accused him of overdoing it, and frankly, she was right.

It had been centuries since he had had the opportunity to prepare for the arrival of a new life, since he had been given the chance to hold a newborn child in his arms. Every time he thought back to that very moment, the first and last time he was allowed to hold a child in his arms, a child that meant more to him than anything else in the world, a child that he loved, he was overwhelmed by the feelings of utter joy and happiness. And then came the despair, the hurt that he felt when that child was taken from him.

It was going to happen all over again.

And that was what was bothering Rose. She could not have the baby in the TARDIS, she would have to return to her own time and place. And that was where she had to stay. She could not return to the TARDIS with a newborn. Travelling with the Doctor had to come to an end. There simply was no place for a child. But what enraged her the most was the fact that the Doctor just seemed to ignore that. He seemed to be oblivious to the fact that once that child was born, there would be no more ‘the Doctor plus one’. It wouldn’t be ‘the Doctor plus two’ either. From that moment on, it would be simply just ‘the Doctor’ again. Alone.

And she hated that.

She wanted to continue to travel with him. She wanted to see the past and the future. She wanted to see the distant planets, the alien races. She just wanted to be with him, wherever he was going to go.

Forever.

But one stupid mistake was going to put an end to all that. There was no forever for the Doctor and Rose. Not anymore. And for that, she just wanted to hate that child she was carrying inside her.

But she couldn’t.

In the beginning, she could just ignore the fact that she was pregnant. It was as if nothing had changed, and nothing was going to change. They just went about their business as usual, stumbled from one adventure into the next. They saw alien worlds, met the future and the past, like they had always done.

Until she felt the first kick.

From that moment on, she could no longer refuse to acknowledge the fact that new life was growing inside her. She felt the discomfort when her child attempted one somersault after the other, the irritating burning when the little one suffered from yet another bout of hiccups. But there were also those little moments of joy when she sat in silence in her room, stroking her baby belly, and though she was not expecting it, received a short, but poignant reply from her child. Sometimes it was just a bump into her ribs, at other times it felt as if the little one was mimicking her movements, replying to her touch with a gentle caress from the inside.

Deep in the night, when she thought she was alone, she would speak to the baby, tell it about her adventures with the Doctor. Never once did she notice the shadow that fell through the crack in the half opened door as the Doctor stood outside in the hallway and watched over her. Night after night. And never once did he make that one simple step it took to enter the room and just be with her.

There were together but not at the same time. The careless laughter, the constant teasing, all that had somehow gone missing. They could not just talk anymore like they used to. And all because they both were dreading the one subject that they both had to deal with very soon – what was going to happen to them once the baby was born?

Neither of them wanted to leave the other, but both knew that that was where they were headed. Their time together had come to an end.

A new chapter lay ahead of Rose, a new life as a mother. She was going to get a chance at the one thing the Doctor could never have – a family of his own. For that, he admired her. And he would never dream of stopping her. Family was much more than he could ever offer her. He would probably have to force her to leave him and stay behind, and though she might not understand it right then, he knew that some time down the road, she would be thankful that he never stood in her way of becoming a mother to her child.

He cared so much for her, more than he could ever put into words. And he cared for the child she was expecting. They both needed and deserved a chance at happiness – and they could only have that without him. This child would grow up without a father, and he would not take its mother as well. He would send them away, for their own sake. For their happiness, he would give up his own.

And those were the unspoken words that stood between them. They both knew what was going to happen, but neither had the courage to bring it up. Ignorance accompanied them day in, day out. They each had found a way to deal with everything on their own, but they had not been able to voice their thoughts and fears to each other.

Time was running out for them.

The countdown the Doctor had set up in the corner of the TARDIS monitor said minus 20 days. It was their way to keep track of when to expect the arrival of their newest companion. And their way of knowing it was time to return to London. It was the day Rose feared the most, more so than the actual arrival of her child. That day marked the beginning of what would probably become the last few days she was going to have with the Doctor. But it also meant she had to do the one thing she had promised the Doctor a long time ago, but had not done so far. She had not told her mum.

She had tried so often, had picked up the phone, dialled her number, but once she had heard her mother’s excited voice on the other end, she could not bring herself to tell her. Not over the phone. That was not how Jackie was supposed to find out.

Now she stood at the console, nervously biting down on her lower lip, and waiting for the Doctor to make the final announcement – that they were returning home.

“Off we go then,” the Doctor said casually as he pushed a button and moved the monitor into his view. “Destination: Powell Estate.”

“Can’t we just…” Rose started, but immediately stopped her train of thought.

“Can’t we just what? Go some place else? No. You’re gonna have that baby soon, and you sure as hell can’t have it in here. You know that.”

“But…” she started to protest, then bit down on her lip once again. Of all the times she had travelled with the Doctor to distant places, had seen danger and never shied away from it – she was a coward now.

“It’s not gonna be that bad. Though, knowing your mother, the first few hours will probably involve a lot of shouting and swearing, maybe a little smacking as well, but she’ll get over it.”

He flashed her a reassuring smile. At first, Rose returned it with a weak one of her own, but it quickly died away and she confessed to him what she was afraid of, “She doesn’t know yet.”

“She… what? Oh, Rose, you promised me! All of the times you talked to her, you never told her?”

“I jus’ couldn’t tell her over the phone. Not sumthing like that.”

“And you think not telling her was a better plan.”

“No, not really. I was hopin’, maybe… oh, I don’t know what I was thinkin’. Couldn’t tell her over the phone though, you know.”

“Terrific. Now we don’t only have to deal with her outburst about you being pregnant, but also have to hear a lecture about why we didn’t tell her earlier.”

Rose stared at him for a moment, mouth hanging wide open, letting the words he had just said sink in. We. He had said we. He hadn’t said she had to deal with it. They had to deal with it. The two of them. Together.

And he didn’t even seem to notice how much of an impact those words had made on Rose when he continued his ramble.

“Still, gotta go home. London, Powell Estate, July 8th, 2006.”

He flipped the switch, the rotor sped up and whirred above their heads, bathing the control room in a lighter shade of blue. They both felt the TARDIS move, whirl around in the vortex.

It all started with a spark of lightning from the console. Then came the eerie hissing only a second later. The Doctor’s cry to hold on got lost in the cracking sound above their heads. The big blue box moved around erratically in the vortex, and for once, she had forgotten all the precautions she had taken to make sure her passengers were sound and safe.

Whether they had hit something or the TARDIS had just taken a sharp turn did not matter. Whatever she had done sent Rose crashing into the console first, then she flew backwards, hitting the pilot seat hard with the back of her head before she landed on the metal floor with a loud thud, belly down. She was oblivious to the Doctor crying out her name in sheer shock as the world in front of her eyes first blurred, then vanished into darkness.

When she came to again, the world around her was still. Darkness engulfed her, and panic washed over her which eased the moment her eyes focused on a small blue light at her side. The familiar buzz of the screwdriver filled the eerie silence in the control room.

“What happened? Why are we not moving?” Rose asked as she struggled to sit up. A sharp pain hit her in the back of her head, and everything around her started to blur.

“Stay still,” the Doctor told her, gently pushing her back down on the ground, “you were out for a few minutes.”

He moved the screwdriver from her stomach to her head, continued the scan in silence for another moment and then sat back on his haunches next to her. His eyebrows narrowed, and the expression on his face told Rose that something was not right.

“You hit your head pretty hard. There’s gonna be a nasty bruise. But what is of most concern right now is something else. You landed on your stomach when you fell.”

Even in the darkness, he could see the horror flash across Rose’s face.

“Don’t worry, the baby is fine as far as I can tell. Steady heartbeat, and as feisty as you. Didn’t want to stay still when I did the scan. I’m pretty sure the little bruiser even stuck out its tongue at me.”

Rose tried to suppress a chuckle, shaking her head in disbelief. As if he could tell that by just waggling the sonic screwdriver over her stomach.

“Oi, I’m serious,” he rebuked, trying to act a little hurt. “I tell you, the baby stuck out her tongue at me. Pretty determined that little one. Told her, she’s gotta stay there in there for a few more days, but I don’t think she wanted to listen.”

“She?” Rose raised her eyebrows at him, “how can you be so sure it’s a girl?”

“Uh oh...” he grimaced, grinning at her sheepishly, “you didn’t want to know.”

“Damn right I didn’t want to know. Told you so more than once,” she poked a finger against his chest sternly, “And you weren’t supposed to know either.”

“Well, what difference does a day make? You would have found out eventually.”

“But not like this. I would’ve liked the Doctor to hand me the baby and say, ‘Miss Tyler, congratulations, it’s a girl’.”

“Don’t I qualify? I’m the Doctor after all,” he bent down close to her, his face stopping just mere inches from hers. A wide grin spread across his face as he said, “Congratulations, Rose Tyler, it’s a girl. Though we gotta wait with the handing you the baby for another day or so.”

“A day or so? Doctor, what are you talking about?”

“Yes, right, that was what I wanted to tell you,” he sat back on his haunches, waggling the screwdriver at her which made a frantic buzzing sound at the motion, “I don’t think she wants to wait another three weeks to come out. She wants out now. Pretty impatient little one she is.”

“Like you can tell that. I don’t even have steady contractions yet.”

“It’s not going to be long until you do. Trust me on that.”

“When did you become a midwife?”

“Oh, I did attend medical school once, but that was a long long long loooooong time ago. Back in those days, a hammer was a widely known anaesthetic. We just whacked the patient over the head with it and they were out cold. Much quicker and cheaper than any kind of medicine.”

“What time was that, the Stone Age?” Rose groaned as she tried to raise to her feet. She struggled for a moment, but finally succeeded when the Doctor lent her a hand. Breathing heavily, she leaned against the console for support while rubbing the sore spot at her side where she had hit the ground. “I don’t intend to have this baby any time soon,” she finally announced.

“You may not intend to, but she wants to. And before you keep telling me that I could possibly not know – you are five centimetres dilated and she is pushing down. You may not have hard contractions yet, but that will change quite soon. Just ask the sonic screwdriver.”

He waved the small gadget in front of her blushing face, then turned and walked to the other side of the control room. His head disappeared behind the bulky edge of the TARDIS console, only to reappear a moment later.

“Gotta get the old lady running again,” he announced as he pulled the lever that once used to be an air pump, but now served as a manual power supply for the alien spaceship, “you really don’t want to be in here when that baby is coming.”

“Certainly not,” Rose replied annoyed, “And quit sayin' that I’m having this baby soon cause I’m not!”

“You can keep on denying to yourself that you have this constant pain in your lower back, that you can feel the baby’s head pushing down and that you’ve been quite uncomfortable since last night because of this unexplainable burning sensation in your, uhm, lower parts, but the Doctor knows best, my dear.”

“Fine, if you think so,” she huffed and plopped down n the pilot’s chair, crossing her arms in front of her chest, “Why are we not movin' anyway? Haven’t figured that one out yet, have you?”

“She’s got her days, the good old girl,” he replied as he stroked his hand over the console, “there has to be something really wrong with her though. She is not responding to me at all. She went into complete lockdown.”

“Complete lockdown? What does that mean?”

“Well,” he began carefully, thinking for a moment how to break the news to Rose, “complete lockdown, yeah – she’s locked us in here.”

“What?” Rose gasped, “And how long does she expect to keep us in here?”

“Last time she did that to me, she locked me in for three days,” he replied, and earned a stern look from his companion, “Guess you didn’t want to hear that.”

“Certainly not.”

“On the upside, we’ve got plenty of food and water. I just restocked the emergency supply the other day.”

A sarcastic chuckle escaped Rose’s lips, “Terrific. Why’d she go into lockdown all of a sudden? Did we hit sumthing?”

The Doctor bit his lower lip as his head once again disappeared behind the console. The buzzing sound of the screwdriver echoed through the control room, followed by some loud banging, obviously caused by the Doctor hitting the metal floor beneath his feet. A moment later, he pulled away one of the plates and slid it aside.

“Be back in a jiffy,” he announced, and jumped into the dark opening.

All Rose could see was a faint blue light moving below her feet, and then vanish into oblivion. The world around her went dark once again. Strange noises emanated from beneath her, banging, hitting, hissing – and then all went silent.

“Doctor?” she called out, her hand absentmindedly stroking her baby belly, trying to calm down the strange, irritating feeling that was slowly creeping up her front.

There was no reply from below.


	3. Chapter 3

At first, it didn’t strike her as odd. Sometimes, the Doctor got so lost in what he was doing that he forgot the whole world around him – her included. The more time passed without a sound though, the more worried she got. She knew the abyss beneath them was deep and steep - like the Grand Canyon, the Doctor once had told her. He had never allowed her to set foot down there. 'Too dangerous and easy to get lost in. Like a maze the size of London' he had said on more than one occasion. He knew his way around down there - at least, Rose hoped he did. The last thing she needed was him getting lost playing Labyrinth.

Well, the last thing she needed besides that sudden cramp that shot through her body, causing her to twitch. Her hand flew to her stomach immediately, heavy breaths escaping her lips until the pain eased slowly.

"Oh, no, no, no, no," she pleaded with her unborn child while she stroked the top of her belly, feeling a light kick in response, "Don't do this to me, not now, please!"

But she forgot the most common trait in Tyler women - stubbornness. Once they had set their mind on something, they were bound to do it. And this little girl was no different.

She didn't know how much time had passed until she heard the squeaking sound of the Doctor's trainers beneath her, and the faint blue light of the screwdriver lighting up the path right beneath where her feet were placed on the metal flooring. All she could tell was that four contractions had come and gone. Plainly speaking - the Doctor had taken his time down in the abyss and she had gone almost stir crazy.

"What the hell took you so long down there?" she spat at him when his head emerged through the opening in the floor.

"Had to get the TARDIS running, now didn't I?" he replied a tad bit irritated as he swung himself out of the hole, dragging what looked a like a black tarp behind him. He quickly unfolded it, revealing four lit up mechanical torches lying inside. He picked up two of them and carefully mounted them onto the console.

"We're not moving now, are we?" he heard Rose's annoyed voice behind him.

The smile on his face slowly vanished after her had turned to look at her. Her face was painfully twitched, one hand clutching her baby belly, the other desperately holding on to the edge of the seat. For the longest moment, he just stood there and stared. This was not what he expected to find once he returned from the abyss - not this fast at least.

He had spent fifty minutes prodding through the lower parts of the TARDIS, trying to find what had caused the complete outage and the time machine to go into complete lockout, but he had come up with nothing. It was probably a hull breach like it had been last time when she had done that to him. If that was the case, there was nothing he could do anyway. The old lady had to heal herself, and they could just sit and wait.

"That was number five," Rose finally breathed after the pain had passed, and broke him out of his daze, "Don't look so shocked, you said I was gonna 'ave contractions soon!"

"Yeah, but I was hoping not so soon," he was by her side immediately, "Number five you said, yeah? Means they're still about ten minutes apart, give or take a little. How's the pain?"

"Still manageable," she replied, but the Doctor could sense the discomfort in her voice and see the pain reflected in her eyes - she was not telling him the truth.

He reached for the screwdriver, and with a whirring sound quickly scanned her mid section. His brow furrowed, and his tongue absentmindedly licked his lower lip - like he always did when he got rather nervous about something.

"Good news, the baby's doing fine considering. Bad news, or you could also say it's good news, depends on how you look at it, she doesn't want to wait until tomorrow. You've gone from five to seven in less than an hour."

Rose let out a gasp, "Bad news. You gotta get the TARDIS workin' again. I ain't havin' this baby in here!"

"I'm afraid I don't have much of a say in it. I think she suffered a hull breach somewhere, and she's the only one who can repair it. That's taking time," she shot him a look that could have killed, "Right, we don't have time. Nothing I can do, though. Sorry. Already tried to coax her into at least giving us some electricity in here, but she's female. She's stubborn. Guess I always pick stubborn women. What's up with that?"

An audible groan came from Rose, and she got up from the floor, directly facing the Doctor. Her fingers curled tightly around his tie, pulling his face close to hers with a quick jerk.

"I won't have this baby in here. No bloody way! You will fix this right now!" she said with a calm, but stern voice, "My baby will not be born inside an alien spaceship! Most of all, not in one that is not functionin' properly. You will fix this or I will rip your bloody head off."

"Yeah, like mother, like daughter," he replied as he carefully pulled his tie out of her grip.

"I'm tellin' you, I ain't havin' this baby in here. We're alone in a fuckin' broken spaceship. It's so far from bein’ a place where I want to have my child. She deserves better than this. She deserves the best care she can get. This is far from being the best. This is... horrible! We don't even have proper lightin' in here!"

Tears started to well in the corner of Rose's eyes. The more she realized that the TARDIS control room was the place where she most likely was going to have her baby, the more desperate she got. As much as she dreaded going home to London, it was exactly where she wanted to be right now. Her mother would know what to do, she'd take her to the nearest hospital and be by her side all the time, she was sure of that.

This - this was a nightmare.

She was alone with the Doctor, trapped inside a time machine which was floating somewhere between time and space.

"I know this is far from being the ideal place for a baby to be born," the Doctor tried to soothe her, his hand reaching out for her face, his fingers tenderly brushing away the tears that were threatening to spill from her eyes, "We'll get through this. I promise. It's going to be all right."

"I'm scared."

"Oh, Rose, I know you are. I'm scared, too," he confessed to her, then added with a whisper, "terrified."

"It's gonna be okay, yeah?"

"Yeah, it's going to be okay. Trust me, I'm the Doctor."

That brought a smile to Rose's lips. Maybe, it was going to be all right after all. The thought still scared her though that the only person able to assist her during the birth was the Doctor who probably had as much experience in child birth as she did - which was none. She was praying to God that the TARDIS would be able to fix herself soon, and she would be able to get to a hospital in time. But if not - at least she was not alone. She had the Doctor with her.

Hours passed that she spent moving around the console, trying to walk out the contractions as they came and went. With each one, the pain intensified, and it had gotten to a level where it had become almost unbearable. Tears started to well in Rose's eyes each time the pain ripped through her body. She was gasping for air, her hands desperately clutching whatever was just in her reach. Relief washed over her face the moment the contraction eased, and she started her path around the console again, always bracing herself for the next assault.

While she walked around in circles, the Doctor grew more and more nervous. She had seen him in the corner, bouncing impatiently from foot to foot. The moment he realized though that she had laid her eyes on him, he had stopped and had flashed her a weak smile. He simply didn't know what to do anymore. He had tried to breathe with her which had just resulted in her yelling at him annoyed that he was irritating the heck out of her. There was no other way he could help her. She had to go through this phase alone now.

The intervals between contractions got shorter as time passed, like they were supposed to. Rose was exhausted, but she wasn't given much chance to rest. The last break she had gotten was a mere ninety seconds. Her body was aching all over, and all she wanted to do was to lay down and sleep.

"I can't do this anymore!" she announced all of a sudden and sank down against the console right where she was, "I'm exhausted, I'm tired and my body is aching all over. I want this to be over now! Please, let this be over now!"

The Doctor was by her side instantly. He saw the tears that trickled down her face and the sheer exhaustion mirrored in her eyes. It hurt him seeing her like that without being able to offer much help. Without saying a word, he held up the screwdriver in front of her mid section and checked on her again, like he had done many times the last few hours.

"You're almost there, just another centimetre," he told her and brushed a strand of her hair out of her face, "you're doing great, Rose."

"I can't," she gasped, trying to catch her breath as the first signs of yet another contraction hit her, "do this anymore. It's too much. Make it stop, Doctor, please, make it stop!"

She closed her eyes, leaning her head back against the console behind her when the full force of the contraction hit her. She didn't take any notice of the Doctor moving his fingers tenderly over face, brushing away her tears. And suddenly, within a split second, she found herself being catapulted into another world.

"Focus on my voice, Rose," she heard the Doctor's voice in the distance.

Slowly, his face materialized in front of her inner eye, a soft and reassuring smile on his face.

"What is this? Where am I?"

Her voice was filled with fright while her eyes moved around desperately, never keeping still as she took in her surroundings.

"This is not real, Rose. We're still inside the TARDIS. I pulled you inside my mind for a moment. It's the only thing I can do to ease your pain. I can't make it go away completely, but I can help you. I can show you how to focus and block it out. You just have to trust me. Do you trust me, Rose?"

"'course I do," she replied and nodded.

"I will put something inside your mind. It'll feel like a memory, but it's not. When the pain is too much to bear, all you have to do is think back to that memory and the pain will ease. You just need to focus on my voice and nothing else. Try to ignore the pain, just for a second. Otherwise it will not work. Do it now."

Rose saw a flash of lightning, then was violently shoved back into reality. When she opened her eyes, she noticed the Doctor's fingers pressed tightly against her temples, his face just a few inches from hers.

"Focus on that memory I gave you."

She just nodded silently. What memory he gave her, she couldn't tell. It was more of a feeling he had placed in the back of her head. Whatever he had done though, it eased the contraction. She could still feel the pressure it was applying to her body, but the pain associated with it had diminished to just a bit of discomfort.

"What..." she gasped, trying to catch her breath.

"It's called a mind link. If you allow me to, I can enter your mind. I can show you my memories."

“Can you see mine?”

He shook his head, “No, not unless you allow me to. Well, technically I could even without you allowing me access, but that wouldn’t be right. I don’t invade anyone’s private thoughts and memories without their permission.”

He slowly removed his hands from her face, letting his fingers linger on her cheeks for just a moment, feeling the dried up tears beneath his skin before he pulled away completely.

“Did it help at least a little?”

She just nodded silently at him while her hand reached for his. Her fingers curled around his, interlocking, and holding on tight.

“Thank you,” she said, almost in a whisper.

The smile returned to his lips, “Pleasure. Now let’s get you a little more comfortable.”

He got up to his feet, and quickly made his way to where the tarp lay discarded on the floor. A moment later, it lay neatly folded on the floor next to Rose, and he helped her move over. What came next, he dreaded the most, and just the thought of it made him blush intensely.

“I, ugh, I gotta – I have to have a look at, ugh, you know, down there,” he stammered his way through the sentence, “see how you’re coming along.”

A flicker of red flashed over Rose’s face in embarrassment, but she knew he was right. She could not have this baby without his assistance, and that meant he not only had to look at her in an intimate way, but also touch and feel. This was not how she had expected that moment to be.

“Rose?”

“Yeah, right, you gotta. Help me with my jeans.”

He helped her raise to her knees, and before the next contraction hit her, she had lost her jeans and knickers. Her shirt barely covered her baby belly, and just the thought of having a half naked woman sit right next to him made the Doctor feel rather uncomfortable. If it had been any woman, he probably would not have cared as much, but this was Rose. His Rose. It didn’t matter at that moment that the reason she had stripped in front of him was a pure medical one. It was still, and always would be, a very intimate moment – one for which he was not prepared.

And apparently, neither was Rose.

Her hands fidgeted with the hem of her shirt, trying to pull it down as far as she could to cover her lower body. She was not very successful though. Thinking quickly, the Doctor took off his jacket and threw it onto the seat before he took off his tie and started unbuttoning his shirt.

“What are you doing?” Rose asked irritated as she watched him pop one button after the other.

“Well, we need something to cover your...” he waved his hand at her legs, rather than saying the actual words, “besides, we don’t have anything to wrap the baby in. This will have to do.”

“But your shirt?”

“I got plenty of ‘em. I'm not going naked if that’s what you’re worried about. See?” He pushed the shirt off his shoulders to reveal a grey cotton t-shirt, “Got a t-shirt underneath like always.”

He draped his white shirt over her legs, feeling better almost instantly. Now there was a barrier between them, and he no longer felt as uneasy as before. She simply could not see him anymore once he stuck his head under his shirt and between her legs. And he could not see her blushing.

With his head still stuck under the shirt, he repositioned the light that was sitting on the ground behind him for better view. For the longest moment, he just stared at what was in front of him, not really knowing how to proceed now. Her water hadn’t broken yet, but he knew exactly it should before the actual birth. Should he break the sack or just let nature run its course? Maybe if he did, it would give the baby the final push she needed to come out. The sooner the better. He didn’t want to see Rose suffer any longer. She had reached her limits, was exhausted beyond exhaustion. It was only the pain and discomfort that kept her awake. He feared that if this was going on for much longer, she would not have the strength anymore to push.

He had to make a decision now.

“Rose,” he announced, and his head popped up from under the shirt, “I am going to break your water. That should help you progress faster.”

“Wait,” she replied as he moved back out of her view, “there’s a contraction coming!”

Even before the contraction hit her body in its fullest, the Doctor had made a small incision and had broken her water. What came next was something he was absolutely not prepared for. With the water gushing out of Rose’s body, and the force of the contraction, the top of the baby’s head came into view for a short moment. He could clearly make out a fuzz of blonde hair, before the contraction passed, and the baby slid back into her mother’s body.

“Blimey,” he gasped as he drew back, his mind in a daze. Never in the nine hundred years of his existence had he seen something as beautiful as that. It was the dawn of a new life, and he was the first one to get a glimpse of it.

“What happened?” Rose exclaimed frightened, and struggled to sit up to peek over the edge of the shirt, just to find the Doctor staring up at her with the biggest smile on his face she had every seen.

“She’s got this small fuzz of blonde hair on the top of her head,” he announced excitedly, “Only saw it for a second, but blimey!”

“Oh, get that stupid shirt off my legs, I want to see what you’re doin’ down there!”

She yanked the garment from her body, and dropped it onto the ground next to her. Bending forward, she tried to get a look over her baby belly, hoping to see what exactly was happening between her legs, but her extended midsection completely blocked her view.

“Blonde, yeah?” Rose’s voice echoed through the control room.

“Perfectly blonde,” he said, and quickly cleared his throat, ”taking after her mother in that matter.”

“You can see her head, yeah? Is not goin’ to take much longer now.”

He shook his head slightly, “If you feel like pushing, I guess just push. I’ll be here to catch her.”

She just nodded at him as the waves of yet another contraction were ripping through her body. They were coming in much shorter intervals now, and the force behind them had doubled. Her whole body tensed, and the urge to push became more prominent as before. As the Doctor had told her, she did not resist anymore, but gave in to what her body wanted her to do. She bore down, pushing with all she had to give, until the contraction had passed. ****


	4. Chapter 4

****For Rose it seemed like eternity, for the Doctor it was a mere twenty minutes that she pushed down with each and every contraction and that he just sat between her legs, watching what was happening. Every time, the top of the child’s head would appear, but vanish again once the contraction was over.

Rose was breathing heavily now, sweat pouring from her forehead.

“I can’t,” she gasped, trying to catch her breath, desperately clutching the edge of the tarp she was sitting on, “I’m so tired.”

“I know you are, luv,” he tried to soothe her, his hand reaching for hers, his thumb tenderly brushing over the back of her hand, “but she won’t make it without you. Your daughter needs your help.”

“Jus’ cut her out then. I don’t care. I can’t push anymore. I just want this to be over. Please, Doctor, do sumthing.”

Her pleading rocked his very core. He wanted to help her so badly, but all he could do was take her pain. Now, it was up to her to bring this baby into the world. He could just be there to catch the little one. Being helpless felt so damn frustrating.

“Listen to me, Rose. You push one more time, and I’ll pull. It’s all I can do to help you. Okay? Just one more push.”

“Just one more, yeah?”

“One more push when the next contraction comes.“

As if on cue, the pain started again, and her whole body shook with the intensity of the contraction. A cry of sheer exhaustion passed through her lips as she once again bore down and tried to push her daughter into the world.

Once the head appeared, the Doctor reached for it, his fingers curling tightly around it. He didn’t pull, just held on to it until he felt Rose’s body relax against the console. The baby’s head was now stuck halfway in, halfway out. His gaze was fixed on the fuzz of hair until he noticed that Rose’s legs on either side of his face had started to shake terribly.

“Whatever you just did, UNDO IT!” she cried out, and tears started to trickle down her cheeks, “NOW!”

“She’s almost here, Rose. She just needs another push, okay? I promise you it’ll be right over, you just need to push one more.”

“It hurts so badly, Doctor. I can’t focus! Make it stop, please, make it stop! Get her out of me!”

“One push, just one push, I promise.”

She gathered the last bit of strength she had and sat up, her hands clutching her knees to stop them from shaking.

“If we ever cross paths with Jack again, I’ll castrate that bloke with my bare hands!” she exclaimed, and the Doctor had to chuckle.

He didn’t have much time to think about her threat though as she started to push even without the next contraction having hit her body yet. The baby’s head first slid slowly, then passed with ease, guided by the Doctor’s calm hands. With a swift move, he turned her sideways, and first the left shoulder, then the right one emerged. A moment later, he held a tiny little girl in his hands.

She let out a loud cry of displeasure at her new surroundings, shivering at the sudden drop in temperature around her. Now he understood why everyone called this a miracle. What he held in his hands was a new life.

He cradled her in the crook of his arm as he cut the cord with the screwdriver, then moved to Rose’s side.

“Blonde hair, didn’t I say?” he laughed while he carefully placed the baby girl on her mother’s chest.

Tears were still trickling down Rose’s face, but these were tears of joy. She quietly brushed over her daughter’s head while a pair of dark blue eyes stared up at her.

“She’s so tiny, isn’t she?”

“Oh, she’s perfect!”

The Doctor placed his shirt over mother and daughter, covering both their bodies. The newborn shortly fixed her gaze on him, but then decided that she rather yawn and make herself comfortable on her mother’s chest, enjoying the warmth she had to offer.

“Is she okay?”

“Absolutely fine. Perfectly fine. Bit small, but she’s gonna grow. Faster than you want her to.”

“Here,” she wrapped the baby tightly into the shirt, then lifted her from her chest and placed her back in the Doctor’s arms, “I’m so exhausted I think I might let her slip.”

“Nah, you won’t. You’ll be fine.”

He tried to hand the newborn back to her mother, but she refused, shaking her head.

“Gimme fifteen minutes to clean myself up a bit, yeah? ‘s gonna be a bit messy.”

He was glad she didn’t ask him for any help delivering the afterbirth. With a nod, he rose to his feet, carefully balancing the precious cargo laying in his arms. Giving Rose the time and space she wanted and needed, he took the baby to the other side of the control room, out of her mother's sight.

At first, the little girl didn't like being moved around and let out a loud scream of displeasure which caused a look of serious alarm on the Doctor's face. When it came to human newborns, he had zero knowledge. Well, no matter what race the newborns were, he had absolutely no knowledge. He bounced her gently in his arms, but that just resulted in even more high pitched screams.

"What, you don't like bouncing? All babies like bouncing. You're supposed to like bouncing. Bouncing is fun," he cooed at the child and started to bounce himself, "See? Bouncing is a lot of fun. I like bouncing. You should really try it."

A pair of big blue eyes settled on his face, and maybe it was the bouncing, maybe it was just his soothing voice, but the baby slowly settled down.

"There, told you you'd like the bouncing," he smiled, and tenderly traced his finger over her tiny nose, "Oi, you need a bath, little lady, get rid of all that sticky stuff on your face."

He reached into the pocket of his trousers and pulled out a hanky. It took him a few minutes to completely clean her face and upper part of the body from the gooey stuff and the blood. He was glad that all she did during that time was either follow his movements with her eyes or just stare off into the distance. In the end, he was rewarded with a big yawn.

"Tired, huh? Was a big day for you after all. Let's see, don't know yet how much you weigh. Gotta know that in case anyone asks. Can't tell them we don't know, now can we?"

He bounced her in his arms once again, causing her eyes to snap open and look at him in confusion. She scrunched up her nose, and not a second later, she screamed at the top of her lungs.

"No, shhh, bouncing is fun, remember? Bounce!"

He bounced again himself, holding her still in arms, but this time, it did not have the desired effect. The baby would not stop crying. He quickly shifted her position, holding her upright and placing her head against his shoulder.

"That any better?" he asked, and in response got a couple of hiccups. The crying, however, was only shortly interrupted by that, and she continued her verbal assault on his ears.

"Want your mum, yeah? Let's see if it's... Rose?"

He stuck his head around the console, trying to spot if it was safe to return the child to her mother. From where he was standing, however, he could not spot her, and she was not answering him. Slowly, he made his way to where he had left her while he carefully held the baby upright in his arms, his hand supporting her tiny head as she cried right into his ear.

When he reached the other side of the console, he found Rose curled up on the ground.

"Shhhh, your mum fell asleep. Don't want to wake her up," he cooed at the newborn who showed no signs of settling down.

He quickly covered Rose with his jacket before he returned to the other side of the console and sat down in the pilot's seat. He bounced the baby girl gently in his arms, then cradled her softly, but she would not stop crying.

"I'm starting to think that you don't like me."

A high pitched scream echoed through the control room, and she then settled to a slightly lower pitch. Fifteen minutes and a now almost deaf ear later, the girl had finally exhausted herself and had fallen asleep, carefully cradled against the Doctor's chest. She was tightly bundled up in his shirt to keep her warm, just her feet sticking out at the bottom.

Now that she was quiet and not fussing anymore, he studied her intently. The top of her head was covered in a fuzz of fine blonde hair which now stuck in each and every direction. He smoothed it carefully, and she briefly twitched under his touch, but didn't wake.

"Hmmmm, now let's see," he shifted her carefully so as to not wake her, and she came to rest lying flat on his arm, her head placed gently in the crook of his arm, "you're probably around five pounds, give or take an ounce. Yeah, that feels about right. About five pounds. Tiny little thing you are. Look at those feet!"

He cupped her left foot with his hand and brushed his thumb over her toes, silently counting as he did so.

"Five on each foot. That's good. Very good. And ten fingers. Even better. Two eyes, two ears, and a nose right where it belongs. If you ask me, absolutely perfect. Definitely perfect,” he whispered, tracing her pink lips with his thumb, “you know you look just like your mum when she was a baby."

At the touch of his finger, the girl instinctively opened her mouth, and started to suck on his thumb.

“Oh dear, no, luv, I am not the right person for that. Don’t have the right equipment. Sorry. You want your mum for that.”  
  
Carefully, he pulled his thumb out of her mouth. He was preparing for another crying fit when her eyes snapped open for a brief moment, but luckily, all she did was kick him, then snuggle closer to his body, making herself comfortable. Her eyes drifted closed only a second later, and sleep had overcome her once again.

For quite a while, all the Doctor did was walk back and forth with the baby in his arms in the dim light, whispering to her and cradling her gently against his chest as she slept peacefully. From time to time, he stole a glance at Rose who, like her daughter, was dead to the world. After all that happened, he didn’t blame her. And, he quite enjoyed the hours alone with the little girl sleeping in his arms.

“She’s called the TARDIS. Time and relative dimension in space. When you’re older, I could take you on a trip to say, the year 5900. They’ve got ice cream in that century that’s to die for. Though, there is actually an intergalactic war going on, so that might not be the perfect time and place…” he grew silent for a moment, pondering, “Lonaserm! Yes, Lonaserm could be a good place to go to. Very friendly people on that planet. No wars, no crime, just harmony wherever you go. Though it’s actually quite a bit dull as well. Maybe – oh yes, I know! Zunda in the year 16000. Pretty safe place, and a lot of exciting things going on as well. And they’ve got great biccies there. Well, they don’t call them biccies, but they taste like them – just loads better. Reckon it must be the Nomar butter they put into them.”

His rambles were interrupted by a low squeak coming from the baby who was slowly getting fuzzy in his arms. Her rosy lips were producing smacking sounds, letting the Doctor know that she was hungry. Bouncing her gently, and cooing at her at the same time, he made his way over to Rose who still lay curled up under his jacket on the TARDIS floor. He had just sat down next to her sleeping body when the little girl let out a loud scream. He shushed her immediately, shifting her into an upright position, her head coming to rest against his shoulder when Rose’s eyes snapped open.

“Hello!” he said cheerfully, “Did you rest well?”

“How long was I out?” she mumbled as she slowly sat up, resting against the side of the console.

“Oh, quite some time. I figured as long as she was content with me, I’d let you sleep. You needed rest.”

Rose watched him silently as he cradled the newborn against his chest, trying to calm her the best he could. Her lips curled into a lopsided smile which did not go unnoticed by the Doctor who immediately returned it with one of his own.

“Ten fingers, ten toes. Already counted,“ he announced, but made no signs of handing the crying baby over to her mother.

For a moment, Rose just let the picture in front of her sink in. There sat the man she loved, cradling her daughter. She wasn’t his, but somehow, that didn’t seem to matter to him. She could see the joy in his eyes, the sheer excitement over the arrival of their newest addition. It broke her heart because she knew that this would not last. They would not stay together - at least, not like this.

“She seems to be quite a peaceful sleeper that little one. That is, once you get her to sleep. Took me half an hour until she was finally out. Quite a strong voice she got.”

“I can hear that,” Rose chuckled.

“Oh yes, right, she’s hungry.”

He finally shifted the newborn from his shoulder and held her out for Rose to take. For a moment, she hesitated and just stared at the crying bundle that the Doctor pressed gently against her chest. But then, like a reflex, her arms wrapped around the baby and she held her daughter tightly against her body.

The little girl stopped her crying and looked up at her mother with eyes big as saucers. She scrunched her nose briefly, sneezed, then continued her screaming. Instinctively, Rose drew her closer to her body, held her tighter as she started to cradle her softly. Her eyes searched for the Doctor’s, silently telling him that it was okay for him to stay. With her free hand, she shifted her shirt upwards and guided her daughter’s face to her half-exposed breast.

The Doctor blushed profoundly and turned his head away, shielding his eyes. Rose chuckled for a moment, but then decided that it was probably the best if he didn’t look. It would just make him feel rather awkward. Not worrying about him anymore, she turned her attention back to her daughter who made a big fuss by constantly turning her head away from her mother’s breast when she tried to offer it to her for nursing. She tried one side, then turned her over and placed her against the other, but the little girl didn’t seem to like either.

“Oh, just do it, would ya?” Rose pleaded with her desperately, but to no avail.

“Maybe you should…” the Doctor started and waved his hand at her, while still shielding his eyes from looking at her, “you know, let her suck at your finger first and then replace it with, er, yeah, well, that thing.”

“Don’t think that’ll help.”

“Just try. It can’t hurt.”

“It won’t help. She doesn’t want to suck,” she snapped at him.

“Of course she wants to suck. She did earlier.”

Forgetting all about his shyness, he reverted his eyes to Rose and the baby as he stuck his little finger inside the girl’s mouth. Almost instantly, she started to suck – much to Rose’s surprise.

“When I pull my finger out, you better be quick.”

It took less than a second for the Doctor to take his finger out of the baby’s mouth and for Rose to replace it with her nipple. The little one’s sucking was never interrupted, and she now feasted eagerly on her mother’s breast.

“Yeah, so don’t tell me you don’t know nothin’ about babies,” Rose scolded the Doctor teasingly while she pulled her shirt partially over her daughter’s face, “you’re doin’ quite good with her.”

“Well, I was a dad once. It was a long time ago. Still remember a few things though.”

Rose’s mouth gaped open at that confession. Never in all the time that she had travelled with him had he mentioned having had a child, but now some of what had happened between them the last few months made sense to her. From the moment she had told him that she was having a baby, he had been more than just excited. He had been ecstatic. Even though this child was not his, he was given a second chance. He could be a father again.

Just except for the fact that was not going to happen.

She was about to say something when the lights in the control room flipped on and the rotor over the console came back to life.

“We’re back in business, baby!” the Doctor exclaimed excitedly as he jumped to his feet and bounced towards the console.

He quickly pulled the monitor towards him, checked the engine status among other things, then pushed it back out of sight as his gaze fixed on the rotor which slowly moved up and down.

“It’s so good to have you back, old lady,” he uttered and brushed his hand over the controls, “Thanks for giving us back power. We’ll go easy on you until you are back to normal. One quick trip back to London and then we’ll let you rest, promised.”  
****


	5. Chapter 5

****Jackie was in the kitchen, washing the dishes when the all so familiar sound of the TARDIS materializing came to her ears. As she looked at the small opening that led into the living room, she shook her head.

“I don’t bloody believe this!” she muttered and walked into the adjoining room.

Arms crossed in front of her chest, she waited for the police box to fully appear in the corner of her living room. It took a long moment until the door opened, and the Doctor stuck his head through the opening, trying to see if the coast was clear.

“How often have I told you not to park that thing inside the flat!” she immediately snapped at him.

“Jackie, hello! It’s good to see you, too.”

The Doctor stepped outside and pulled the door in closed tightly behind him so Jackie would not see inside. She raised her eyebrows as she took in the way he looked. His hair was sticking in each and every direction. He had lost his shirt and tie under his jacket, and his t-shirt was stained with a bunch of brown blotches that looked like dried blood to her.

“Where’s Rose?” she inquired as her eyes narrowed in on him.

“Promise me you’re not going to yell.”

“Where’s Rose?” she asked again, this time a hint of fear in her voice, “Where’s my daughter?”

“She’s fine. She’s inside.”

“Why’s she not coming out then?”

“You have to promise me you are not going to yell.”

“Yell about what?”

The Doctor hesitated for a moment, but realizing that he was getting nowhere with Jackie, he pushed the TARDIS door open and stuck his head inside, calling for Rose. She appeared in the doorway a moment later, cradling the baby in her arms.

What happened next, neither of them had seen coming. Jackie reached out and slapped the Doctor right across the face.

“Oi, what did you do that for!” he exclaimed and rubbed his cheek, but she just ignored him.

“I trusted you with my daughter!”

“Jackie, it’s not what it looks like...”

“’s not what it looks like? You trying to tell me my daughter is not standing there in the doorway of your time machine with a baby in her arms! ‘Cause that’s exactly what it bloody looks like!”

“Mum, don’t,” Rose tried to interrupt her, but once Jackie Tyler had started, there was no stopping her.

“She’s twenty years old. She’s got no job, no money, no husband,” Suddenly, a thought crossed her mind, “Oh please don’t tell me you two got...”

“Oh, no no no!” the Doctor answered her rather quickly.

“That’s even worse for Pete’s sake! Don’t you have any decency?”

“Mum!”

“My daughter is single mum, I don’t bloody believe it! I’m only forty! I am too young to be a granny!”

“Mum, SHUT UP!”

Rose’s annoyed voice echoed through the living room, and the child in her arms let out a whimper when her slumber was interrupted by all the yelling that was going on.

“See now why I didn’t tell her sooner?” she told the Doctor and handed him the baby, then walked past her mother.

“Rose!” Jackie called as she hurried behind her daughter and caught up with her in the hall.

“You didn’t even give me a chance to explain, mum,” she huffed as she pushed the door to the bathroom open, “I need a shower.”

With a loud bang, she slammed the door shut in her mother’s face.

“ROSE!”

The Doctor poked his head around the corner, an irritated look on his face. When he noticed that Jackie was standing alone in the hall, he quickly pulled back which did not go unnoticed.

“You!” he heard Jackie screech behind him and he made a mad dash for the TARDIS. Reality sank back in when he reached the locked blue doors that hiding inside his time machine was not an option as the old lady had gone back into lockdown to repair herself.

“Would someone tell me what is going on for Pete’s sake!”

“Meet your granddaughter!” the Doctor just beamed at her while he shifted the baby to his other arm. “Doesn’t have a name yet, the little lady, but I am sure we’ll find one that suits her well.”

“Who exactly do you think you are?” she exclaimed in a high pitched tone, “I trusted you with her, and this is how you repay me!”

“What?” Slowly, he began to understand what she was getting at, “The baby’s not mine, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“‘S not? Then where did she come from?”

“Oh, you know, when a male and a female fancy each other…”

“Oh, I know that,” she brushed him off, “At least tell me, was he alien?”

The Doctor shook his head, “A hundred percent pure human. Nice guy, too.”

“Yeah, so where is this nice guy then now? Obviously not with Rose and the baby.”

“He died.”

Jackie opened her mouth to say something, but when she couldn’t come up with anything witty, she just remained silent. Her eyes reverted to her grandchild, and she couldn’t stop the smile from spreading over her whole face.

“Oh, she looks just like Rose when she was a baby.”

“She does, doesn’t she?”

“How do you know?”

“Oooh, long story. Might tell you another day.”

“I didn’t meet you back then, did I? I don’t remember if I did.”

“Yes, it’s a story for another time, Jackie. Maybe even a bedtime story for this little girl here. Right now, we’ve got some more important things to focus on.”

Jackie closed the distance to the Doctor and now stood in arm’s reach to him. Carefully, she brushed over the baby’s hair, smoothing it. She didn’t dare ask if she could hold her, not after everything she had just said and done. But oh was she dying to take that little bundle into her arms.

“She’s so tiny!”

The Doctor noticed her hesitation and took matters into his own hands. He shifted the little girl from his arms into her grandmother’s. Big round eyes stared up at Jackie who studied the newborn intently.

“What is that you dressed her in? ‘S that your shirt? Couldn’t you dress her properly? Oi, she’s not even wearin’ a nappy!”

“Well…. She was a bit impatient and came early. It’s not like we planned for her to be born in the TARDIS. I mean, she’s a great ship, really, but she’s not the place where you want to have your child, right?”

“My daughter had her baby in there? Alone?”

“Oi, she wasn’t alone, she had me!”

“Couldn’t you take her to a hospital or somefing?”

“Don’t you think I would have if I could have?” he replied, getting really annoyed by all of her questions.

“How long ago did she have the baby?”

“Oh…” the Doctor silently counted, and his eyes went heavenwards, “seven hours. No, wait, that’s not Earth time. Four hours. Almost five.”

“Five hours…. Has she seen a real doctor yet?”

He shook his head, “First stop London, Tyler residence.”

“Gotta call the doctor then. Rose needs to see a doctor. And the baby, too. You sure they’re not going to find anything alien about her?”

“Absolutely a hundred percent sure. Nothing alien whatsoever about her.”

“Right,” Jackie drew the baby closer to her body, “she is so tiny!”

“Yes, you already mentioned that. Why don’t you make that call to the Doctor’s Surgery and I will check on Rose, okay?”

He ushered her towards the phone at the other end of the living room, making sure she was going to make that call before he headed down the hallway towards the bathroom. He knocked on the door softly, then more insistently, and he heard the water inside being turned off.

“Give me ten bloody minutes for myself, mum!” Rose’s voice echoed through the closed door.

“It’s me, Rose. You okay in there?”

“Fine. I’ll be out in a few.”

The water turned back on, and the Doctor decided that he needed to keep more of an eye on Jackie than Rose. When he returned to the living room, she was still on the phone, talking animatedly with whoever was on the other line.

“Yes, I tell you. Just showed up at my doorstep with a baby in her arms. She’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen though. Got those big blue eyes just like Rose when she was a baby. I wonder if they’re gonna stay that colour or turn brown like Rose’s did. Either way, she is such a cutie!”

He silently rolled his eyes. That woman was one of the strangest creatures he had ever met in his entire life. One moment, she could be all furious about something, and the next, she’d be a drooling idiot over the exact same thing.

“An hour, yeah, we can make that. Gotta find some clothes for the baby though. Can you believe they just wrapped her in a shirt? That’s all she’s wearing, the poor baby, a bloody shirt!”

“At least she’s not completely naked,” the Doctor muttered under his breath as he plopped down on the couch. His eyes fixed on the baby in Jackie’s arms, but from this angle, all he could see was a pair of bare feet waggling up and down, constantly kicking against Jackie’s chest which rather amused him.

She was still on the phone when Rose walked back into the living room. The younger woman frowned when she noticed that the Doctor was sitting on the couch without the baby and stopped drying her hair with the towel she held in her hands. With a rather amused grin on his face, the alien silently indicated her mother.

Rose gaped. The baby now lay over her mum’s shoulder, and a pair of curious eyes took in the surroundings. With the phone stuck between her other shoulder and her ear, Jackie was patting her granddaughter’s back softly with her free hand while she cradled her whole body to soothe the child and keep her calm.

“Who’s she talkin’ to?” she asked as she sat down next to the Doctor and propped her feet up on the coffee table.

“Doctor’s Surgery. She’s gonna take you and the baby for a check up later.”

“She still mad at me?”

“Not as much as before I think,” he replied and turned towards her, “You feeling better now?”

“My whole body still feels pretty sore, but the shower helped a lot,” Rose once again glanced at her mother, “Did she start cooing at the baby like a madman yet? That’s usually the first thing she does.”

“Well, she did talk a lot of gibberish. The words alien and tiny came up quite a few times.”

“You did tell her she’s human, yeah?”

“Course I did. She had this strange idea that she was mine. Had to set her straight, didn’t I?”

“Yeah,” Rose sighed, and her heart fell.

The Doctor immediately noticed the hurt look on her face, “Well, you know, humans sometimes have this strange misconception that blood relations are the most important there are when actually, they are not. On Gallifrey, relations were not made based on blood and DNA. We made our bonds based on what’s in here,” he pointed his finger at his temple, “and here,” a quick tap to his chest made Rose finally turn to him, “a link of mind and soul on a purely emotional level. Such bonds are rare. Quite rare actually. But if you find that one out of a gazillion, you’ll just know. You have an understanding that goes way beyond what words can express. It’s much much muuuuuch stronger than any blood relation could ever be.”

He flashed her a smile that made her heart melt. Sometimes, he had a strange way of saying things. Actually, he always had a strange way of saying things if he wanted to dodge the actual subject. She knew that expressing his feelings one way or another had never been one of his strong points.

But with what he had just told her, he had said the one thing she had wanted to hear from him for so long without actually saying it. His eyes told her all she needed to know. She was that one in a gazillion to him. And so was her daughter.

“Anyway,” he uttered quickly to ease the tension between them.

Before he could finish his thought, Jackie’s shrill voice made both their heads snap in the direction of the phone.

“Don’t ya have some sort of proper clothing in that time machine of yours?” she said annoyed and walked over to the sofa, “I can’t bloody believe you just wrapped my granddaughter in a shirt!”

“We do, mum,” Rose snapped at her, “’s just out of reach at the moment.”

“We can’t take her to the doctor’s like this, can we? Now I hafta go down to Marsha’s and ask if I can borrow a babygro and a coupla nappies. And that’ll probably make her ask me lotsa questions to which I have no answers, now do I?”

She shook her head at the couple sitting in front of her, then turned on her heels and made her way towards the front door.

“Mum!” Rose called after her, and she whirled around immediately, “The baby? You wanna take her down to Marsha’s with ya?”

“Heavens no! She’d just ask even more questions and we’ll never get to leave.”

Carefully, she placed the baby in her daughter’s arms. With a smile on her face, she brushed her fingers over the newborn’s head and cooed at her, “Oh, you’re such a little angel, ain’t you? Such a beautiful little face. Yeah, cutie cutie cutie!”

Rose just shook her head at her mother and let out a chuckle which didn’t go unnoticed by Jackie, “What?”

“Just go down to Marsha’s, will ya?” the younger woman laughed as she shifted the baby to lay against her shoulder, “I’ll get ready so we can leave when ya get back.”

“All right, all right, jus’ get rid of your old mum. I’m going, I’m going!”

A moment later, she was down the hallway and almost out the door, “Oh, before I forget, they said they’ll need a name for the records!”

The front door banged in its hinges, and Rose and the Doctor were left alone in the flat.

“What does she think? That I’m gonna pick a name for the baby in fifteen minutes?” Rose huffed annoyed.

“You didn’t pick one yet? You’ve had lots of time to think about one.”

“Oh, not you, too. I haven’t picked one yet, all right? Couldn’t come up with anything that sounded decent. ‘S not like she can jus’ change it if she doesn’t like it. She’ll be stuck with whatever I choose for the rest of her life.”

“See, that’s why everyone calls me ‘the Doctor’. Plain and simple, and definitely not offensive in any language.”

“Yeah, that helps,” she sighed and moved around, handing the child to the Doctor, “Hafta get dressed before mum comes back up.”

She rose from the couch with a great deal of difficulty. Her body was aching all over again, especially the muscles in her back. She hadn’t felt like this since the five mile run in Secondary school that her teacher had sent her on for bunking off from P.E. for seven weeks in a row.

“Just take your time, we’re awfully comfy here at the moment.”

When she turned towards the Doctor, there was that smile on his face again that always made her heart melt. But this time, it was not directed at her - it was directed at the small bundle he cuddled in his arms. She could have sworn she saw a smile flash over her daughter’s face while she stared up at him wide-eyed.

Yes. He definitely was right about one thing. Blood did not matter at all. ****


	6. Chapter 6

“Couldn’t you have come up with somefing other than ‘our car broke down in the countryside and we had no mobile signal’? That was very believable,” Jackie muttered as she opened the door to the flat and walked inside.

“Wanted me to say that my friend’s time machine got stuck in a vortex between time and space? Yeah, that would’ve been much more believable.”

Rose wasn’t far behind, cradling the sleeping baby in her arms. She closed the door and followed her mother down the short hall towards the kitchen. Inside, she pulled the fridge door open and got herself a bottle of water while Jackie was sorting through the drawer that contained all the takeaway menus.

“Doctor? Mum’s gonna go out to get a takeaway. What ya in the mood for?” she called out loud, but got no answer. “Doctor?”

Her heart started to race, and she could only think about one thing – he had left her without saying goodbye. Just like he had done with Sarah Jane. He had promised her he would never walk out on her like that, never ever. And yet, he seemed to have done just that!

“Oh, for Pete’s sake, why’s that thing still parked in my living room?” her mother’s voice broke her out of her daze, and she rushed into the adjoining room. Her eyes immediately fixed on the big blue box that stood in the corner, right where they had parked it earlier.

Relief washed over her face, and she took in a gulp of air. He would never go anywhere without his precious TARDIS. Wherever he had gone off to, he would be back. He would come back to her.

“She’s broken. He can’t move her until she’s repaired,” she explained to her mother.

“Then he better bloody repair that thing. I don’t want it standing in my living room forever. Where’s he gone off to anyway?”

Rose just shrugged her shoulders and sat down on the sofa. She propped her feet up on the fake white leather and shifted the baby so she lay snuggled against her chest. Hopefully, she’d continue sleeping as peacefully as she did right now for a little while longer and allow her to get a short nap herself. If her daughter continued her four-hourly feeds, she’d have another hour before the newborn would wake up again to claim her next meal.

“’s Indian all right with you, Rose?” Jackie asked on her way back to the kitchen, “I hafta pop into the shop as well to get nappies. She’s gonna go through a few before the morning.”

“Jus’ not the spicy stuff, yeah?”

“I was thinkin’ about that rice dish for two. It’s really good and there’ll be plenty 'n all well if the Doctor decides to return in time for dinner.”

“Sounds good to me,” Rose sighed as she laid her head back against the cushions and closed her eyes.

“Be back in about an hour.”

She heard the front door open and close, and the flat became silent. All she could hear was the steady shallow breathing of her baby daughter. Her hand absentmindedly stroked the child’s back. Fingers travelled softly over tiny arms which lay draped across her chest, occasionally curling around a small hand, just to let go of it a moment later. For the longest time, she just revelled in the feel of the soft skin under her touch. Occasionally, the baby would move slightly to adjust her position into a more comfortable one.

Suddenly, the front door opened and closed again with a loud bang.

“Shhh, don’t wake the baby!” Rose hissed, expecting her mum to walk into the living room. Instead, she heard another thump, followed by low rustling noises and footsteps. Suddenly, a face appeared over hers.

“Sorry. Didn’t think you’d be home already,” the Doctor whispered as he bent over the back of the sofa.

“Got back about twenty minutes ago. Where’d you head off to?”

“Oh, got a bit boring in here. Tried the telly for a while. Gotta wonder what people call entertainment these days. So I went for a stroll. I meant to be back before you got home, but I got a bit sidetracked I think. I went shopping,” he told her with a wide grin on his face.

“You went shoppin’? You gettin’ sick? You hate shoppin’ of any kind.”

“Well, yeah, usually I do. But you know, I found this shop while I was out and they had all these things on sale. I thought they’d come in handy.”

He drew back from the sofa and walked back into the hall, just to reappear a moment later, holding a baby seat in one hand, and a couple big carrier bags in the other, filled to the top. He placed everything on the coffee table while Rose sat up, carefully balancing her daughter in her arms and trying not to wake her while she shifted positions.

“I was told it’s top of the line. Cost a bomb even on sale, so it better be. Do you know how expensive baby stuff is on Earth? On Nemases, I could have gotten a hetch drive for the same amount of money.”

“You went baby shoppin'?”

Rose couldn’t help but stare at the Doctor and the things he had bought for the baby. In front of her not only sat a blue-red-yellow checked baby seat, but also two bags full of baby clothes. One had fallen over, spilling its contents all over the table. There lay at least a dozen multicoloured babygros, vests and booties. On top of it all lay something, that brought a smile to her face. It was a dark blue babygro, covered with the sun and the moon, different planets and stars – and a big space ship on the front.

“Well, she needs something to wear, doesn’t she?”

“You’re so sweet, thank you,” she placed a quick kiss on his cheek, then smiled at him broadly.

“I’m sweet, eh? I don’t think anyone ever called me sweet before. I’ve been called a lot of things, but not that,” he chuckled while his hand tenderly cupped the baby girl’s head, “You thought about a name yet?”

Rose shook her head, “My mum went all mental on me when I couldn’t tell the doctor ‘cause she can’t get a birth certificate until she has a name. Mum said I hafta pick by tomorrow but I dunno why. The Doctors said you have forty-two days to get one. I hate being rushed.”

“Maybe you should just start jotting down names. There might be one that speaks to you after a while. And then if you still haven’t decided by tomorrow, we can do eeny meeny miney moe.”

Rose snorted, “I’m not gonna pick a name for her doing eeny meeny miney moe.”

“Well, one way or another you have to pick one.”

“I know I hafta. I just can’t decide. It’s a pretty big decision, ya know. What if I pick a name and in five years I’ll go ‘what was I thinkin’ when I named her that?’?”

“Oh, don’t worry so much, Rose Tyler. You’ll do perfectly well whatever you decide on. For now,” his hands curled tightly around the baby’s small body as he lifted her from her mother’s arms, “how do you like your new seat, luv?”

Carefully, he placed the little girl in the carrier. Her arms and legs flailed in the air for a very brief moment, and she turned her head from side to side. Low squeaking sounds rushed across her lips. Once she had found herself a comfortable position, she settled down, and fell back into a fitful slumber.

The two adults stood over her, just watching her as she slept so peacefully in the seat. They stood side by side, their bodies barely touching until Rose silently slipped her hand inside the Doctor’s. His fingers curled around hers instantly, intertwining with hers. With a sigh, she leaned to the side and placed her head against his shoulder.

“She looks so beautiful. Like a little princess.”

A smile broke out on his lips, and his hold on her hand tightened as he whispered, “Just like her mother.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Baby cries filled the whole Tyler flat. It wasn’t the first time since the day before that feet paced the floor in the living room restlessly. Away from the sofa towards the hall, around the dining table, then turning right at the telly before starting the same walk again and again and again. It didn’t help to settle down the child. None of it did. Not the singing, not the talking, not the cradling, not the cooing – and not the bouncing.

She wasn’t hungry, neither did she need her nappy changed. She also didn’t care whether she was carried lying down or being held upright, whether she was placed in her seat or on a fluffy cushion on the sofa. It also didn’t matter who it was that was tending to her. She simply did not stop crying.

Rose had fallen asleep on the sofa from sheer exhaustion shortly after dawn. Her daughter had not given her even a minute of rest. She was a restless baby, a screamer, for no apparent reason. Nursing, crying, nursing, crying, nursing crying – that had been her rhythm for the night. The little one had not once quieted down for more than a couple of minutes. Even in her sleep, whimpers escaped her rosy lips, turning louder and more heart-breaking as time passed, and she eventually woke herself with her own crying.

“Some babies are jus’ that way,” Jackie Tyler had told them before she had headed off to her bedroom with a pair of earplugs.

The clock on the wall read twelve minutes past seven when she emerged from her room and appeared in the living room.

“You’re still up with her?” she gasped when she noticed the Doctor rounding the dining table once again with a whimpering baby in his arms.

“Nah, we’re just doing this for fun,” he replied and flashed her a sarcastic smile.

“Lemme show you something.”

Jackie held her arms in front of her, indicated to the Doctor that she wanted him to hand over the baby. He rolled his eyes and sighed, then carefully placed the girl in her grandmother’s arm. It didn’t even take a second until high pitched screams echoed through the living room, and Rose shot up from the sofa.

She brushed blonde, twisted locks out of her face while through blurry eyes, she fixed her gaze on her mother who stood right behind her.

“After Rose was born, she had these crying fits when nothing would calm her down. Pete and I were up with her night and day, but she wouldn’t settle down. The doctor couldn’t find anythin’ wrong with her. Went on like that for weeks. I thought I was going mental. So one day, Pete came home from work and he’d gotten her this lovely pink dress with white flowers down the front. Had the poppers on the back. I placed her down on her stomach so I could dress her, and she stopped crying and was all bubbly and happy.”

With a swift move, Jackie turned over the baby in her arms. Her hand held on to the newborn’s thigh as she came to lay on her arm, belly down. The little one continued to whimper for a very short moment, but then gradually settled down until only an occasional hiccup was heard.

“Couldn’t have told me that last night, could ya!” Rose groaned and plopped back onto the sofa, dragging one of the cushions over her face.

“Part of being a mum is findin’ out things on your own. You hafta get to know your daughter. What she likes and what she doesn’t,” Jackie replied as she rocked her granddaughter softly in her arms, trying to lull her to sleep, “’s gonna take time. ‘s not gonna happen over night, y’know.”

“She doesn’t need to be fed for another coupla hours. Will ya take her till then? I’m beyond tired, mum,” Rose’s muffled voice said from below the pillow.

“Oi, I hafta be at work at eight.”

“I can take her,” the Doctor chimed in and stuffed his hands into his pockets, beaming at Jackie, a grin on his face that reached from ear to ear.

“Oh, you repair that stupid blue box of yours that’s still sittin’ in my living room and get it outta here. Gonna call work and let them know I ain’t comin’ in today.”

With that, she turned on her heels and vanished into the kitchen. The Doctor sighed deeply as he made his way towards the sofa. He sat down in front of it, his head coming to rest against one of Rose’s bare thighs. For a while, he just sat there, quietly watching how her chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm.

“Like watchin’ me?” Rose’s voice suddenly startled him, and she removed the cushion from her face.

With a cheeky grin on her face, she turned onto her side. Her hand reached out for him and her fingers tenderly laced through his hair.

“You’ve got two hours,” he smiled back at her, “make good use of ‘em.”

“You gonna be here when I wake up, yeah?”

“Course I am. Where would I go?”

“Jus’ checkin’.”

“Most important rule for any mum – get sleep while you can. So follow the Doctor’s orders and go back to sleep, okay? I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

And he kept his promise. When Rose opened her eyes a couple of hours later after being gently poked in the shoulder, the first thing she saw was the Doctor’s smiling face. He still sat in the same spot as before – it looked as if he hadn’t even moved an inch.

“Did anyone ever tell you that you snore?” he inquired.

“Do not!” Rose snorted.

“Oh yes, you do. Pretty loud as well. Ask your mum.”

“I don’t snore. I know.”

“How would you? You’re asleep. You can’t hear yourself.”

“Oh, stop teasin’ me, will ya?” She playfully slapped him across his upper arm, “Where’s the baby?”

“With your mum. She’s all over her, I tell you. Wouldn’t let me hold her for even a minute! I had to listen to her rambling on for the last two hours. She’s got all these questions that I couldn’t answer. Well, I could have, but you know, I shouldn’t be the one to talk to her about all that. You really have to talk to her.”

“Oh yeah, she’s dyin’ to know who the dad is, isn’t she?”

“Course she is. She wouldn’t be Jackie Tyler if she wasn’t.”

“Guess I hafta talk to her after all. Can’t get any worse, now can it?”

“Do you honestly want me to answer that?”

Rose shook her head and laughed, “No.”

“You’ll do fine, don’t worry. And by the way, your mum’s picking names for the baby. Does she really think Alice is a decent name? Always reminds me of Alice in Wonderland. We wouldn’t want her to fall through a rabbit hole at some point, now would we? With a name like that, she’ll be prone to getting herself into trouble.”

“Oh no, she’s not!” Rose sat up like lightning and was up and about immediately.

“Beatrice is a decent name. Eleanor even. Or Isabella,” he continued his rambling, oblivious to the fact that Rose was already halfway across the living room, “Amelia is a good solid name as well. Maybe even Violet.”

His train of thought was cut off by a quick peck that was placed on his cheek. Surprised, he turned to his side and saw Rose smiling all over her face.

“Thank you,” she said to him before she rushed back into the kitchen.

Her mother had her back turned towards her as she stood at the worktop at the far end. The baby lay on her arm belly down, and a pair of wide awake, curious eyes peeked around the side of her body. They seemed to fix on Rose for a very short moment, before they travelled all across the room again.

“So, you’re pickin’ names,” Rose inquired as she folded her arms in front of her chest and leaned against the kitchen door, “Don’tcha think you should’ve asked me?”

Jackie jerked, and dropped the pen she had been holding in her hand, “You just bloody scared me almost to death!”

“I’m pickin’ a name for the baby, not you.”

She took the newborn from her mother’s arm and placed her over her shoulder, gently rubbing her back.

“I wasn’t givin’ her a name or anythin’. Jus’ wrote down some ideas. Thought I could help.”

Jackie held out a piece of paper, waggling it in front of Rose’s face. But the younger woman didn’t take it. She just shook her head and turned on her heels, leaving the kitchen. Her mother followed her suit.

“Rose!”

“Jus’ leave me alone, mum, will ya?”

“Ooooh, raging hormones,” the Doctor whistled as he grabbed his suit jacket from the back of one of the chairs at the dining table.

“You and I hafta talk, Rose.”

“Jus’ give me some space, yeah? I need to feed the baby.”

“Talk, that sounds like a very good idea,” the Time Lord interjected just as the baby started to scream, “You two just talk and I will go out to get myself some…. paint. Yeah, paint. The old lady could do with some painting. I’m gonna paint the TARDIS, brilliant idea! Blue paint it is! Be back in a jiffy!”

With that, the Doctor hurried out of the flat, leaving the two arguing women behind.

“Listen to you, Rose. Not once have I heard you call her your daughter. She’s always ‘the baby’ to you. She’s not just that. She’s your daughter, for Pete’s sake!” Jackie abruptly stopped her tirade and turned towards the hall, “Did he just say he wants to paint his spaceship? Inside my living room? What the hell does he think he’s doing? He’s a complete nutter, that one!”

“He’s not gonna paint the TARDIS, mum. ‘s just his way of givin' us time to talk.”

“Oh, so now you want to talk.”

Rose rolled her eyes and shook her head, then went over to the sofa and sat down. First she propped her feet up on the coffee table, then settled herself into a comfortable position before she began to nurse her daughter. The child eagerly accepted what was offered to her as rosy lips feasted and smooth, warm baby skin pressed tightly against her mother’s.

“I know I’ve not been a good daughter, lately,” Rose finally spoke, her eyes fixed on the baby in her arms as she was not able to look at her mother, “I disappointed you. I let you down.”

“Oh, baby, no. Don’t say that,” Jackie was by her daughter’s side immediately. Her hand reached out for her cheek, and with gentle force, turned Rose’s face towards her, “You didn’t let me down.”

“I know I did, mum,” tears slowly started to well in the younger woman’s eyes, “I’m twenty, I got no job, no money and no home. I’m travellin’ with an alien through time and space, I’m never in one place longer than a coupla weeks and now I’ve also got a baby! How could I not let you down?”

“From the day you were born, all I wanted for you was to be happy. You are happy, aren’t you? Travellin’ with him – it made you happy, yeah?”

Rose just nodded silently as a single tear trickled down her cheek.

“You got the chance to see the world and the whole universe. I’ve never been further than the other side of the bloody Thames!”

“But I ruined ev’rything! I’ve got a baby, mum! I’ve got a daughter! I’m a mum!” Rose sobbed, tears now spilling freely from her eyes.

“Shhh, ’s gonna be okay. ‘s all gonna be okay.”

Jackie gathered her daughter into her arms, holding her close while she cried into her shoulder.

“I was so mad at Mickey for leavin’ me like that! He jus’ walked out on me without a word. I was so hurt. Jus’ wanted some comfort ‘n’ all and this is what happened! A bloody one night stand and I got myself knocked up!”

“I know, baby, I know.”

“And he never said a word! Not once! He never shouted at me, he was never mad at me, nothing!”

Jackie didn’t have to ask who Rose was talking about. She knew it was not the baby’s father she was referring to. It was the Doctor. It always came back to him.

“And then she came and suddenly, he’s all over her like she’s his but she’s not. He went shoppin’ for her all over this stupid universe. And he doesn’t even like shoppin’! I’m gonna hurt him, mum, I’m gonna hurt him so much. He’s been so good to me, and I’m just gonna hurt him!”

“You’re not gonna hurt ‘im, Rose,” Jackie tried to calm her down, but her daughter just shook her head, “I will, mum. I’m gonna take her away from him. She can’t stay with us.”

“Wait, wait,” she pulled back and stared at her teary-eyed daughter in shock, “What do you mean, the baby won’t stay with you?”

“She can’t travel with us, mum. ‘s too dangerous for her out there.”

“You’re not goin’ back travellin’ with him!”

“Mum, I have to. It’s who I’ve become. Rose Tyler, the Doctor’s companion.”

“You’ve become a mum, that’s who you are.”

“I can’t leave ‘im.”

“But you can leave your daughter?”

Anger and fury rose in Jackie’s eyes which glared at her daughter, piercing her with a cold stare.

“You’ve not the seen the things he's done, mum. He’s saved the whole fucking universe! More than once! And he did it all alone until he found me! I’m not gonna leave ‘im. I can’t! He needs someone out there. I want to be that someone for him!”

“But what about her?” Both women looked at the tiny bundle that had fallen asleep in Rose’s arms, “You want to leave her behind?”

“She can’t come with us. She wouldn’t be safe. And I want her to be safe.”

“You’re all she’s got, Rose. Look at her. That little girl is your daughter. She needs you.”

“I…. I can’t do this. I’m not a mum,” with that, she placed the child in her mother’s arms, “I’m Rose Tyler. I’m the Doctor’s companion!”

She sprang up from the sofa and ran out of the living room, leaving a very confused Jackie behind. ****


	7. Chapter 7

****The Doctor slowly pushed the door to the Tyler flat open. Sticking his head inside, he tried to make sure the coast was clear. If Rose hadn’t told Jackie that him painting the TARDIS was just his idea of a sorry excuse to get away, he’d be in for a major ear bashing, he was sure of that. But the flat lay quiet, not even a sounds to be heard from the baby.

Carefully, so as not to make too much noise, he closed the door behind him and crept into the living room. He was hoping to find Rose, but it was only Jackie he encountered cradling the baby in her arms.

“Didn’t get any blue paint ya liked?” Jackie spat at him, and immediately he could tell that something was up.

“Forgot they don’t have the vortex proof brand here on Earth,” he flashed her a cocky smile, trying to ease her mood, but he wasn’t very successful, “Where’s Rose?”

“Locked herself in her room about an hour ago. ‘s all your flamin' fault, you stupid bloody alien!”

“What did I do now?”

“She’s got this crazy idea that she’ll just keep on travellin’ with you in that bloody time machine of yours – without the baby.”

“I know,” he replied and the smile on his face disappeared in an instant as he stuffed his hands into the pockets of his trousers.

“And?”

“And what?” he shrugged, “It’s her decision, Jackie. She’s a grown woman.”

Jackie’s expression turned even darker, and she shot him a look that could have killed, “Look at my gran’daughter and tell her that you’re takin’ her mother from her!”

“I’m not taking her mother from her,” he stated calmly while his eyes fixed on the child.

“You’re not?”

His head snapped back up at the sound of Jackie’s voice, “I need Rose, yes, but that little girl needs her even more. Rose has to find that out on her own though. She has to want it. Only then will she be able to be the mother you want her to be. If I tell her she can’t come with me anymore, she’ll probably blame the baby for the rest of her life.”

“And how do you know that she won’t jus’ go off with ya?”

“I have faith in her. Right now, she’s trying to convince her mind of one thing while her heart tells her another. She’s confused. It’s all new to her. I don’t blame her for that, and you shouldn’t either. I know that in the end, she’ll do the right thing.”

“She’s so distant with the little one. Almost feels like she’s only doing what she has to do. I thought I raised my daughter better than that.”

“You raised a brilliant, clever, young woman, Jackie, don’t ever doubt that. Just give her a little time, will you? She’ll come around. She’ll be a magnificent mum, your Rose. ”

“But she didn’t even give her a name yet. My gran’daughter’s still nameless.”

“Oh, I don’t think so,” the Doctor beamed at her as he tenderly brushed his fingers over the small blonde fuzz of hair that crowned the baby’s head.

“She told you her name?”

“Well, no, she didn’t tell me her name, but I know that the little angel’s got one. Everyone has a name. It’s just that Rose hasn’t told us yet.”

Suddenly, a voice cut in from behind them, “Her name’s Isabella.”

“Isabella!” the Doctor exclaimed joyfully as he whirled around to face Rose, “Fabulous name, very good choice. Isabella, Bella, Bella!” He turned back to Jackie and the baby, his eyes glistening with awe as they settled on the little girl, “Yes, definitely a very good choice. Hello Isabella Tyler.”

The newborn’s eyes opened at the sound of her new name and gazed up at him, then travelled to his side and fixed on the person who had come to stand next to the Time Lord. Big blue eyes blinked a few times as a pair of rosy lips curled into what looked like a smile.

“Guess she likes it,” Rose stated as she lifted her daughter from her mother’s arms and started to coo at her, “You like the name, yeah? Did mummy do good?”

A wide smile broke out not only on the Doctor’s face when they heard Rose refer to herself as a mother for the first time. It was a first step into the right direction.

“Where did that name come from all of a sudden?” Jackie inquired, and Rose looked up. But her gaze was not directed at her mother. Instead, she glanced at the Doctor, her lips pursed into a grin.

“It was his suggestion.”

“It was?” the Doctor replied, raising his eyebrows in surprise, “When did I... Oh right, yes, I did mention that name, didn’t I? Been around quite a few centuries. I’ve heard plenty of good names. And I talk quite a lot as well, I suppose. My thoughts sound so much clearer when I say them out loud. But that doesn’t mean you have to listen to any of it because I tend to ramble at times.”

“Too right,” Rose laughed as she reached up and placed a quick kiss on his cheek, “Thank you. The name’s a keeper.”

“Just make sure you don’t blame me if you don’t like that name anymore in a few years,” he teased as he waggled a finger at her.

“Ain’t gonna happen.”

“Good. Cause I’d hate to see her fall down a rabbit hole.”

A snort escaped Rose, and she immediately bit down on her lower lip so as not to burst out laughing. Sometimes, he was just impossible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Slowly, the Doctor stuck his head inside the open door to Rose’s room. He had heard Isabella’s whimpers, but they had quietened down before they’d turned into screams. He knew he shouldn’t check in on Rose and the baby at every noise he heard coming from their room, but somehow, he couldn’t help himself. Part of him had to make sure that Rose was on the path to making the right decision. The other part of him just wanted to be near them. This was as close as he would ever get to having a family now. He knew it wouldn’t last, but while it did, he would enjoy every single minute of it.

He eyed Rose sitting in the middle of her bed, her daughter pressed tightly against her chest as she nursed her. Low hums filled the room as she cradled the child gently in her arms, oblivious to anything that was happening around her. The Doctor took that as a good sign. All of Rose’s attention was directed at little Isabella – like it should be. It was almost like those many nights on the TARDIS when he had stood in her doorway and had listened to her hum the same tune to her then still unborn daughter. And like then, he felt it was best if he did not intrude and he should leave her alone for the time being.

Silently, he pulled his head back. The slight movement did not go unnoticed by Rose and her head shot up in direction of the door.

“Doctor?”

His name crossed her lips as a whisper in the dark night. Ever so slowly, the Doctor moved back inside the room, his back coming to rest against the door as he stuffed his hands into the pockets of his trousers. His face flushed slightly at the sight in front of him, and he turned his eyes away.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to...”

“’s okay,” she replied as she held out her hand to him, “Sit with me for a while?”

He hesitated for a moment, but then approached the bed and sat down next to her.

“Sneaky little tyrant, isn’t she? Keeping you up to the wee hours of dawn,” he remarked while his hand cupped one tiny little foot and his thumb tenderly brushed over the sole.

“She was doing that even before she was born. ’s quite enjoyable.”

“Is it really? That sounded quite different last night.”

“As long’s she’s not cryin’ and screamin’ I mean,” Rose laughed quietly as she detached her daughter from her breast and quickly pulled down her tank top just in time for the loud belch that crossed Isabella's lips and the milk that spilled down her front.

"Oh yeah, just puke all over me," she sighed and held the baby against the Doctor’s chest. His arms immediately snaked around the little girl’s body. A yawn escaped Isabella’s lips as she made herself comfortable, and her eyes drifted closed only a moment later as she lay snuggled against his chest.

"Here, in case she's gonna puke again," Rose said as she handed a cloth to the Doctor before she reached over the side of her bed and picked up a t-shirt that lay discarded on the floor. She turned her back towards him and quickly slipped the tank top over her head, replacing it with the fresh t-shirt only a second later.

The Doctor was so occupied with cleaning the baby's face and placing the cloth under her head that he never even noticed Rose stripping right next to him. He first noticed that the blue tank top had turned into a yellow t-shirt when he reached for the pillow behind his back, trying to pull it into a more comfortable position. His eyebrows furrowed, and Rose was expecting him to say something. However, what he told her took her by surprise.

“Scoot over a bit. I might just stay a little longer.”

The mattress shifted with the movement as he propped himself up against the many pillows while he carefully balanced Isabella in his arms. Rose’s head came to rest against his shoulder, her hand placed gently on her daughter’s back, right on top of the Doctor’s as she lay spooned up next to him.

Just a few days ago, she couldn’t even picture him doing something like that, just laying next to her, offering her the comfort she wanted. Ever since Isabella had entered his life, he had started to change, had started to open up to those around him. She had found a special place in his heart, and for that, Rose was grateful.

"You've been talkin' a lot with my mum," she whispered into his shoulder, trying to avoid his stare, "What you told her about Jack..."

His gaze wandered over to her, his eyes glistening with sorrow, "I'm so sorry."

"Why did you never say a word about that to me?"

"A lot of things were going on when we came back from Sattelite Five. I mean, me regenerating and all that. And then you told me you were expecting her... I just felt that wasn't the right time to tell you that Jack had died."

There was a long pause of silence that was only interrupted by the soft snore coming from the baby. She slept so peacefully snuggled against the Doctor's chest, it was almost a natural fit.

"Do you remember the last words he said to me?" Rose whispered, her eyes still fixed on her daughter as she tried to avoid looking at the Doctor.

"See you in hell?"

She had to bite down on her lip to not burst out laughing, "No, not that."

"Yeah, I remember," the Doctor replied quietly, that touch of softness in his voice that made her stomach flutter, "He was right. You are worth fighting for, Rose Tyler."

Their eyes met for a very brief moment, and Rose noticed that gleam in his eyes that she had grown to love so much over the last few months. A smile crept over her lips the moment Isabella hiccupped and spat out part of her nightly meal right across the cloth that the Doctor so carefully had placed under her. Even before Rose could move, the Doctor had reached over the tiny body sprawled across his chest and wiped her face clean. He was so good with her, like it was the most natural thing for him to do. It made Rose's heart ache. There was one thing she needed to tell him, and just looking at how he tended to Isabella made this all the more difficult to say.

“I heard you movin’ things around earlier,” she finally said, “is the TARDIS workin’ again?”

“Well, she’s letting me in again and the power’s back up in the console room, but she isn’t moving anywhere in time for a while. I suppose I could move her out of the living room so your mum will finally get off my back, but I reckon that’ll drain all the power she’s accumulated so far. Maybe in a week she’ll be fit enough to travel through time and space again.”

“You want to head off in a week then, yeah?”

“I suppose. Off to new adventures.”

“A week is pretty soon,” Rose said reluctantly, trying to find the right words for what she wanted to say. As much as she had tried to choose between the two people she loved with all her heart, she had already reached the point where she knew that only Isabella could be her choice. But how was she going to tell him? How was she going to tell him that after all he had done for her, and for Isabella, she was just going to leave him behind?

“Rose...” he started, but she cut him off immediately, “I mean, with Isabella and all. ‘s just pretty soon you know.”

“Rose,” he tried again, “You... I... You know I would never tell you to leave the TARDIS unless you want to leave. You will always be welcome aboard. I love having you with me.”

She looked up at him, and saw the concern in his eyes. As much as he tried to mask any emotion on his face, he could never hide it completely. His eyes were the mirrors of his soul, and they always would be. If she wanted to know what was going on in his mind, she only had to study his eyes. They were his tell.

“Why are you tellin’ me this?” she asked, though she already knew what he was trying to tell her. Maybe if she heard it from him, it would feel more like the right decision to make.

“You’ve got Isabella now. Did I ever tell you that’s a beautiful name you chose?” That remark brought a smile to Rose’s face, “Yeah, beautiful name, isn’t it? Isabella, Bella, Bella.” His lips tenderly brushed over the baby’s head, and he whispered, “You’re the one adventure I can never have.”

“You could,” Rose’s voice sounded so innocent as the words came over her lips, “Jus’ be a part of her life.”

“Oh, you know I can’t,” his voice was shaking, unshed tears glistening in his eyes as he turned his head away, “I’d love to. I really really really would love to. But I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I travel. That’s what I do. I never stay in one place long, you know that. It’s just not who I am.”

“But you always come back here in the end. To London. Isn’t that enough?”

“It’s just not the same.”

They both fell silent for a while, until the Doctor spoke the words that had been left unspoken between them.

“So you're not coming with me then.”

“I want to,” was the immediate response he got, followed but even more silence before Rose finally whispered, “I missed my dad a lot when I grew up. Still had my mum though. Isabella only has me. If I go, if I leave her behind, she’s alone. I don’t want to do that to her. I know it’s the right thing to do, but why does it still feel like it’s not?”

“Oh, Rose.”

When he turned to her, he saw the tears welling in the corner of her eyes. Carefully, so as to not disturb the sleeping baby, he reached over and cupped her cheek with his hand, tenderly brushing away a tear that threatened to spill from her left eye with his thumb.

“Decisions like these are never easy to make. But you are doing the right thing, don’t you ever doubt that. You’ve got a whole new adventure ahead of you. It’s going to be so different from anything you have ever experienced, but trust me when I say it’s the one adventure you really don’t want to miss. All those things I’ve seen in time and space, it’s nothing compared to this. Live it to the fullest, Rose. You won’t regret it.”

A weak smile appeared on Rose’s face as she turned into his touch and closed her eyes for a moment to stop the tears from falling freely. She didn’t want to cry. Not now. Not in front of him. It would make it all just so much harder. Her hand found its way on top of his, holding it in place, letting it linger on her cheek. It was the one thing that made it all better at the moment, the one thing she found comfort in. His touch.

She moved closer to him, her body pressed tightly against his. That was how they came to rest, all three of them, held in one embrace as they lay on the bed. Isabella snored softly on the Doctor’s chest, one of his hands protectively resting on her back while her mother had fallen asleep with her head resting against his shoulder. His arm was wrapped around her, holding her close to him as both their hands had intertwined and come to a rest on her stomach.

And for the first time in what seemed like decades, the Doctor fell into a fitful sleep himself. ****


	8. Chapter 8

****The sun shone brightly on that Sunday afternoon that would mark the parting of ways for the Doctor and Rose Tyler. It was funny though because Rose had half expected it to rain on that day. It would have matched her mood better than sunshine.

The Doctor had already moved the TARDIS outside of the Tyler flat days ago. The big blue box now stood parked in the wide open space behind the Powell Estate, close to the garages. It wasn’t the spot he usually parked her in, right in front of the Tyler flat. He had told Rose it was a glitch in the TARDIS’s so called KSLFG system, which on Earth was probably the equivalent to GPS, that had taken him slightly off track.

But it was a lie. He didn’t want her standing up there in front of the flat, constantly looking down and observing the TARDIS which she probably would have done if he had parked it right under her nose. The distance where the blue box sat now wasn’t far, but it was enough that he didn’t have to worry about her. He spent his days in the Tyler flat, marvelling at Isabella day in, day out. They always went by in such a rush, as if the clock was speeding, while the nights he spent lonely in the console room of his spaceship, tinkering with the controls, just slowly ticked by.

He was back with Rose in the wee hours of dawn when Isabella woke up and greeted the new day with loud screams. And he was still there in the late hours at night when Rose had already retreated to bed while her daughter was wide awake and enjoyed the company of the ever so talkative alien man.

But that all came to an end on that one Sunday afternoon.

The door to the TARDIS stood wide open, an invitation to come inside, but Rose couldn’t. She stood in the doorway, baby in her arms, and just couldn’t walk over the threshold. The last moments she had spent inside the time machine had been happy moments – the time her daughter was born, the first time she had held her in her arms. That was how she wanted to remember the TARDIS, a place of happiness. A place of hope. If she walked inside now, she would always remember her as the one place where she had to say goodbye to the Doctor. And that, she didn’t want.

“Not coming inside?” she heard the Doctor’s voice from the other end of the console room. Fast footsteps approached as his trainers squeaked on the metal flooring. Not a second later, he stood in front of her.

And all she could do was shake her head at him.

A reassuring smile played across his lips, letting her know that it was all right. He understood. He placed his hand on her shoulder and led her away from the blue box, right into the sunshine where Jackie was waiting for them.

“Beautiful day, isn’t it?” he said as his gaze wandered up towards the sun. He squeezed his eyes shut as he let the warm rays of light tingle on his skin for a moment before he turned back to look at Rose.

Her face was sombre, her eyes red rimmed. She had been crying, he could tell. A goodbye like this was never easy – which was why he usually preferred to just leave without a tearful scene. However with Rose, it was all different. He couldn’t sneak away from her without a goodbye. With her, it was worth every single tear.

“Hey Isabella, Bella, Bella,” he exclaimed joyfully as he plucked the child out of her mother’s arms and held her up in front of his face.

A pair of big blue eyes looked at him curiously, and he couldn’t help the grin spreading on his face and his eyes lighting up. He whirled her around in the sun for a moment, then settled her against his shoulder.

“You are very special to me, Isabella,” he whispered to her, making sure that Rose could not hear what he was telling her, “you took your first breaths in my arms. Such a marvellous tiny little thing you were when I held you for the first time. You will always, you hear me, always, be something special to me. If you ever need me, just call for me. Call for the Doctor and I will find you, no matter where and when you are. I’ll be there in a heartbeat. That’s a promise.”

He placed his cheek against the top of her head and closed his eyes. Sweet baby scent filled his nose, something he had grown so accustomed to over the last few days. Something he would miss terribly. There was nothing out there in the whole wide universe that came even close to that baby smell. He inhaled sharply, taking in every whiff of baby smell he could get to treasure it forever.

“Don’t forget, okay?” he said softly and placed a tender kiss on the top of her head before he handed her over to Jackie who immediately retreated, giving Rose and him the time alone that they needed to say their goodbyes.

Rose’s voice almost cracked as she spoke, “Can’t you stay a little longer?”

“Oh, I’ve been here for far too long already. I need to get back out there,” he replied, desperately trying to steady his voice. He had to be strong. For Rose.

“I don’t even know what to say.”

“You don’t need to say anything.”

“But there’s so much I want to tell you before you go.”

“Oh, I know, Rose.”

His fingers brushed tenderly across her cheek, and the tears she had been fighting so badly started to well in her eyes. A single one trickled down her face, but a thumb wiped it away quickly, gently caressing her skin as it moved ever so slowly.

“I’ve got something for you.”

He retrieved his hand and reached inside the pocket of his jacket, pulling out a small, plastic object which he held out for her.

“It’s a sonic camera.”

A snort erupted from Rose’s lips, “A sonic camera. You’re jokin’,”

“Oi, there’s more than just sonic screwdrivers out there,” he rebuked, almost sounding a little hurt, “It’s linked to the TARDIS. Whatever picture you take with it, it’ll send it right on to the monitor on the console. Take a picture of Isabella for me once in a while, will you?”

She nodded silently as she took the small camera from him and stuffed it in the pocket of her jeans.

“This is it then I guess,” she took a deep breath, trying to loosen the knot that had formed inside her throat. She had tried so hard not to cry in front of him, but the more she looked at him, the more she studied his eyes and saw them clouding with tears, she could not hold them back anymore, “This is goodbye.”

A sob escaped her and tears fell freely from her eyes.

“I’ve never been good at this,” the Doctor confessed and he flashed her a compassionate smile while he desperately tried to keep his eyes from tearing up.

“I...” Rose choked on the words she desperately wanted to tell him before he went. Those three little words she had wanted to tell him for so long. This was her last chance.

Finally, they came shuddering out of her mouth, “I love you.”

A single tear slipped from the Doctor’s right eye as he gazed at her with tenderness and devotion.

“Oh Rose, I...”

She cut him off before he could even say it, gently pressing her fingertips against his lips, “You don’t need to say it. You’ve shown me already. I just needed to tell you before you go.”

The smile on his face slowly faded as his hands cupped her face, his thumbs brushing over her lips before he leaned in and placed a kiss on her forehead. When he pulled back, he stared into a pair of tear stricken eyes that sparkled and glittered in the sunlight, and a wide smile lit up the face he was gazing at.

What happened next though, he did not expect. A hand reached out for him and cupped the back of his neck as a pair of rosy lips sank down on his in a tender kiss. Fingers travelled through his hair, probing and exploring while mouths clashed against each other, feeling, tasting, taking in every little detail.

His eyes were closed when they broke the kiss. Licking his tongue over the seam of his lips, he took in every last bit of Rose before his eyelids snapped open. Opposite him stood Rose with her face flushed red, teeth biting down on her lower lip.

“Yeah, well.... all right...” he stammered, for once at a loss of words.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to...”

“It’s okay. It’s perfectly okay.” He pulled her into a tight hug, whispering into her ear, “I love you, Rose Tyler. Don’t you ever forget that.”

With that, he released her from his arms and flashed her one last smile before he turned and walked back to the TARDIS. He stopped in the doorway and looked back at Rose through tear-stricken eyes before he stepped inside and closed the door the behind him.

The sound of the TARDIS dematerializing got lost over the loud, heart-breaking sobs that erupted from Rose’s lips. She had buried her face behind her hands, had turned her head away. She didn’t want to see the blue box vanish in the distance, didn’t want to hear the sound it made one final time. It was too much to bear.

How much she wished that the arm she felt around her shoulders was the Doctor’s, the shoulder she cried into, but it was just her mother who had gathered her into a hug for comfort.

Their ways had parted.

Her time with the Doctor had come to an end.

A new adventure had started for both of them, but each quite different from the other. Whatever it was that lay ahead for either of them, they would master it - like they always had. And maybe at some time, their paths would cross again. With the Doctor as your friend, you could never be sure what tomorrow would bring.


	9. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, yeah.... I couldn't really stop where I ended the story, now could I? And before anyone asks, this is where it really ends ;)

****When he stepped out of the TARDIS, he was delighted to find the day he had chosen to be warm and sunny. It was a perfect spring day in South London. He had parked the blue box in the bushes of a local park, hidden behind shrubs and trees. Not exactly the place he had had in mind when he picked the coordinates, but his maps hardly ever listed any kind of vegetation since that just changed too quickly. One day, it was wide open space, the next, he found himself in the middle of a forest.

The location was right though. He knew that the moment he heard the joyous laughter of children playing nearby. They had not moved the playground since he’d been here the last time. His feet carried him to his destination, as if that was the only place he could go in the whole wide universe.

It didn’t take long until he reached the object of his desire. He stood hidden behind a tree, barely noticable from the playground, but he had a perfect view of what was going on. His eyes were scanning the large group of children. He was looking for that one child he came here for. It didn’t take him long until he spotted a little blonde girl with bunches playing had with a couple of other kids. A smile lit up his face.

That was her. That was Isabella.

He already knew she had to be around somewhere since he had spotted Rose the moment he approached the playground. She sat on one of the benches, her back towards where he was standing, as she was observing the children. All the more reason to stay right where he was, hidden in the trees. Part of him wanted to walk over, pick her up from that bench and wrap her into a hug, but part of him also knew that she now had a life of her own. A life without him. And he couldn't just intrude. But right now, that didn’t really matter to him because he had found that little girl that had taken her first breaths in his arms.

It had been years since he had held her last. On that day that had haunted him almost every single second since then. He had thought it would be easy to just walk away and leave them behind, like he had done it so many times before. Turn around and never look back.

But it was different this time.

Maybe it was because of all those pictures that Rose had sent him since he had left them, never allowing him to cut off their ties completely. Or maybe it was just because of the one thing he had told Rose so long ago. That blood did not matter.

He wanted so desperately to just walk over to Isabella and sweep her off her feet into a big hug. But he knew he couldn’t. He was nothing but a stranger to the girl. And that was his own fault.

He didn’t know how long he stood there and watched her. Even though it had probably been an hour, it still felt too short when Rose called for Isabella, and soon after, the small group of mothers and children disassembled and they all went separate ways, leaving the playground eerily empty. That was when he noticed the bunny that lay discarded in the grass where the children had played before. Oh, how well he knew that bunny.

He had picked it up on Diovs Five Seven.

While it looked like a normal brown cuddly toy bunny, he knew it was much more than that. There lay a secret buried within that toy, a secret he knew Isabella had already discovered. With big steps, he jogged over to the grass where he picked up the bunny. Studying it for a moment, he noticed that it had lost an eye and that the left ear was all chewed up. This was definitely one well loved cuddly toy.

And Isabella had just left him behind. Like he had left them behind. His fingers curled tightly around the soft fabric, and there was only one thing he could think of. He had to get this bunny back to her, no matter what it took.

“Doctor!” a voice suddenly exclaimed, and his head jerked to his side.

Both his hearts stopped for a very short moment when he noticed that the person who had called out for him was Isabella. She came running towards him, arms spread wide, and a smile on her face that just made his heart melt. He didn't know what he was expecting from her when she caught up with him. Maybe a hug, a kiss even. But all she did was grab her bunny out of his hands and hold it tight.

“’s mine,” she told him.

“Then don’t forget him again,” he smiled at her and his whole face lit up when she rewarded him with a big grin, “His name’s Doctor Snuggles.”

She waggled the bunny in front of his face, and the Doctor just laughed. Of course she had not called out for him, why would she? Again he was reminded, that he was nothing but a stranger to her. She had called out for her well-loved bunny he was holding. What an odd name for a toy.

“Why is his name Doctor Snuggles?” he inquired as he poked the bunny with his finger.

“Cuz he likes to snuggle wif me, silly,” Isabella giggled in response.

The Doctor laughed. Of course, what a silly question that had been. Wasn’t that why he gotten that bunny, because it was supposed to be a child’s dearest companion?

The longer he looked at Isabella, the more he just wanted to gather her into his arms and hold her tight. His eyes clouded with unshed tears which he tried to blink away, but he was not very successful. His vision started to blur, and a single tear slipped down his face.

“Why are you cwyin’?” he heard Isabella say, her voice sounding so far away all of a sudden. A small finger reached for his cheek, gently touching the tear that had spilled from his eyes. “Don’t cwy.”

She held out his bunny towards him, indicating for him to take it.

“Doctor Snuggles can make you ‘appy. ‘e tells stowies. They make me ‘appy.”

The wide smile returned to his face, “I am happy. Extremely happy. Some people just cry when they are happy.”

“Laugh when you’re ‘appy!” the girl told him with a grin on her face, still holding the toy out for him to take.

“Oh, Isabella...”

The little girl stared at him irritated. How could this stranger possibly know her name? Her eyes narrowed in on him, until all of a sudden, her head snapped up, and her face started to glow all over. Her eyes fixed on someone behind the Doctor, and she joyfully exclaimed, “Mummy!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They had gotten as far as the duck pond when Isabella had noticed with alarm that she had left Doctor Snuggles at the playground. There was no chance of holding her back anymore as the girl bolted from her mother's hand and ran back towards towards the playground to get her best friend. Rose wasn't far behind her. Her feet carried as far as the outer edges of the sand pit when she stopped dead in her tracks. Her eyes fixed on the familiar brown suit that the man crouched down in the middle of the park was wearing. Her daughter's voice calling out for the Doctor made her tense, and for just a short moment, she saw his face when he turned towards Isabella.

That could not be. After all those years without as much as a word from him, she had begun to think that he had forgotten about them.

But apparently, he had not.

She just watched as the Doctor handed the cuddly toy back to her daughter. The well loved bunny that had to go everywhere Isabella went as well. From the day he had left them, Isabella and that bunny had become almost inseparable.

Slowly, her feet carried her towards them without her even realizing it. It wasn’t until she heard Isabella call her name and squeal with delight that she noticed she was standing only a few feet behind them.

The Doctor’s head spun in her direction, and she saw the smile drain from his face.

“Rose....”

His voice was almost a whisper which got lost in the happy squeals of a young girl who ran towards her mother, the toy bunny clutched tightly against her chest. A pair of waiting arms enveloped Isabella and lifted her up high in the air.

“You’ve made a new friend?” Rose asked her daughter while she tickled her, enticing delighted giggles from the child.

“’e’s strange. ‘e cwies when e’s ‘appy.”

“Does he?”

She looked up from her daughter and found the Doctor standing right opposite them. He had that smile on his face she had missed so much over the years, the smile that could make her forget everything around her.

Her lips curled into a smile of her own which lit up her whole face.

“After all these years you’re still wearin’ the same suit,” she teased him as she stood Isabella back down on the ground.

“It’s comfy, you know,” he replied with a tenderness in his voice that gave her goose bumps.

“I thought you'd forgotten about us.”

The words hung between them like thick, rainy clouds which vanished the moment he stepped closer, shaking his head slightly. His hand reached out for her face, his thumb tenderly brushing over the seam of her lips.

“Not a second went by that I haven’t thought about you and Isabella,” his eyes fell onto the little girl again who now just grinned at him broadly, “She’s grown so much.”

“I’m almos’ four!”

She raised four chubby little fingers into the air and waggled them in front of him which just caused him to chuckle as he shook his head at her, then looked back at Rose.

“You did good, Rose,” his voice was soft and tender, and he pulled back his hand, stuffing it into the pocket of his trousers, “With her, I mean.”

“God knows it wasn’t easy in the beginnin’. After you left....” her voice trailed off, and she swallowed hard. Again, the words hung midair between them, neither one really knowing what to say.

“I’ve made a mistake,” the Doctor suddenly blurted out, “I’ve made a terrible mistake, Rose.”

She just stared at him, shrugging her shoulders. Her eyes told him she didn’t understand what he meant, but that she wanted to know and help.

“I ran from the one adventure I really wanted to have because I was afraid. Now I know that it was a mistake. You were right, and I was wrong. I've got a time machine. I can leave one moment and be back the next without anyone ever noticing that I was gone. And I always come back here. Why did I think that it's not enough? Because it is. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

He didn’t have to tell her what adventure he was talking about. She knew. She had known the moment he had said that there was one adventure he could never have, that he had been oh so wrong. It had been right in front of his eyes. All he had to do was take it.

A warm smile touched her lips as she bent down to her daughter and whispered something into her ear. Isabella’s gaze wandered up to the Doctor instantly. Her eyes first widened in surprise, then she giggled. A moment later, her arms were stretched out into the air, telling the Doctor that she wanted him to pick her up.

He did so without saying a word.

“Hafta tell ya a secwet,” she whispered and waggled her finger at him.

His face came closer to hers whilst his eyes remained fixed on Rose, who had a wicked grin on her face, and was biting down on her lower lip.

“My bunny is Doctor Snuggles because my mummy said that the bunny was fwom the Doctor and when I was a baby I weally liked to snuggle with the Doctor. But then the Doctor went away. But he left me my bunny so I could snuggle with him till he comes back.”

Tears welled in the corners of his eyes as he listened to the words that little Isabella whispered into his ear. The last few words she spoke almost made both of his hearts stop.

“Are you gonna be my Doctor Snuggles now?”

He turned to her while his hand cupped her head like he had done with her so often when she was still a baby. Eyes glistening with tears shone at her as he smiled, “Yes, I’ll be your Doctor Snuggles, Isabella.”

“Are you gonna be my mummy’s Doctor Snuggles too?”

He burst out laughing at that oh so innocent sounding question, but he knew immediately that was what made Isabella giggle earlier. His eyes searched for Rose who still had that same grin on her face, but tears were now welling in the corners of her eyes. He swallowed hard, thought for a moment, but words failed him. He had learned a long time ago though that with her, he didn’t always need to say it out loud.

So all he did was hold his arm out to her, and she willingly stepped into his embrace. One arm wrapped tightly around her, the other holding on tightly to her daughter.

“I can’t promise you eternity, Rose,” he whispered into her ear, burying his nose deep into her shoulder length blonde hair.

“I don’t need eternity, Doctor. I only need you.”

“You’ve got me.”

Rose leaned her head back and gazed at him lovingly, “You know that means you have to start livin’ in a proper house when you are here in London.”

“A house, augh,” he grimaced at the mere thought of it, “With doors and walls and windows and carpets and all that... stuff. Me. In a house.”

Rose just laughed, “’s not as bad as it sounds. Isabella and I jus’ moved into a small terraced house. It’s got doors ‘n walls ‘n windows ‘n carpets ‘nd all that stuff. Even got a garden.”

“Now that’s... that’s really terrifying.”

“Don’t you just love that?”

He answered her with a broad smile, “Oh, absolutely!”

“We’ve got room in the garden. You know, for the TARDIS. And enough space inside the house... if you like. Though you know, it’s got those walls ‘n windows ‘n things...“

He didn’t give her an answer right away, and Rose thought she had probably said the wrong thing to him, when his eyes suddenly began to sparkle and the words came from lips ever so slowly, “I’d love to. Really love to.”

“I got my own woom now,” Isabella told him excitedly, “Wanna see?”

“Oh yes, of course I want to see. I bet it’s got a door and a window and walls and also a carpet?”

“Uh huh, and it’s pink. I love pink. The walls are pink aaaand my bed’s pink aaaaand my table’s pink aaaaand the floor’s pink. And my nanny painted all my other fings pink. ’s all pink.”

“Ooooh, now that’s a lot of pink,” he laughed at the girl’s enthusiasm.

“It’s also got a few other colours here and there, hasn't it, Bella?”

“The door’s white.”

“Pink walls, white doors... me in a house, that really doesn't sound right. Terrifying. Absolutely terrifying.”

“Wouldn’t be you if it wasn’t.”

“Oh yeah. C’mon,” he reached for Rose’s hand, and his fingers curled tightly around hers. Then he turned to Isabella, "Which way is home?"

A tiny arm reached out to the left, "That way!"

“Off we go then!”

Together, the three of them walked off, talking and laughing. Just like a family. The one adventure the Doctor so desperately wanted to have had finally started.


End file.
